(Closed) reception invites after dinner?

posted 10 years ago in Paper
Post # 3
2640 posts
Sugar bee

Oh goodness.  I don’t think you do.  I wouldn’t recommend that.  It’s like saying, "You’re good…. but not quite good enough."

Maybe you can explain the situation.  Perhaps there is a exception.  But without a really good reason, I would advise against this.

Post # 4
613 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

I’m confused.  You are holding a reception separate from the dinner?  Is cultural, like tea party maybe?

Do you mean to ask people to come to the reception after dinner is over?  If this is the case, don’t send an invitation.  I am assuming these are a bunch of ‘friends’ in your age group that are not that close.  At my best friends wedding, a bunch of friends of friends wanted to come, and she just told them to come after 10 pm.  I dont think you should send an invitation though if you ar ento inviting them to the ceremony or dinner.

Can you give more details…why would they be invited to the reception but not the dinner?

Post # 5
1379 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

I have the same questions as the others — if you are looking for them to just come for dancing/partying, I wouldn’t send them an invitiation at all — I think that it might be a little offensive.  If anything I would just mail (or even email!) a very simple card with "Please join us at 9pm for the celebration of our marriage."  But I do find that a bit odd personally.

Post # 7
217 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

I’ve been to two weddings where this was the case, and the reason behind it was tht the ceremony and dinner portion were for a very small group, but then there was drinking and dancing to follow.  I didn’t find it offensive, but I can see how it would be tricky to avoid having some hurt feelings if you’re not careful in the way that you word things.

Post # 8
596 posts
Busy bee

If it’s only 8 girls, I wouldn’t go through the effort of making a whole new set of invites.  I would probably just mention it to them casually in conversation like "Hey I know you have to work that night and won’t be able to make the entire reception but would you like to come by afterwards, maybe around 9PM?  I’d love it if you could at least stop by for a bit!"

But that’s just me – I wouldn’t want to stress about the proper wording and etiquette for a unique type of invite!

Post # 9
2292 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2008

If the issue is that they are working, and so simply can’t make it to dinner, I would just send them a regular invitation.  They can RSVP that they are unable to join you for the ceremony and dinner, but will stop by later in the evening.  We had several guests who, for one reason or another, could make it to the ceremony only, or the reception only – we still invited them to both. 

If the issue is really that you wouldn’t invite them to the ceremony and dinner, whether or not they were working, but think they might enjoy stopping by for drinks and dancing only, I think that a verbal invitation, or a short hand-written note, is probably sufficient.  I don’t know that you need to do a whole separate printed invitation for just 8 people.

Post # 10
374 posts
Helper bee

Hi there.  I agree, don’t send them a separate invitation.  I am unclear also about the actual marriage ceremony.  I assume they will work and can’t make the ceremony nor the dinner.

My personal opinion is invite them verbally.  I like the approach, “I know you have to work” I would then add, “but we’d love it if you could join us for the after’s around 8 PM after you get out of work for cocktails and dancing.  Just let me know if you can make it, so can have a table set aside for you.”

If you really feel an invitation is in your heart of hearts, go ahead and DIY on the computer, or use computer paper to print out a nice computer invitation that reads:

JOIN US FOR THE AFTERS for cocktails and dancing following our wedding ceremony





Please let us know what you decide. 

THE AFTERS is what I believe the British call it.  Check it out on the internet.  I think it’s catchy.   Keep in touch.

Post # 11
374 posts
Helper bee

OOOPS.  Wedding come and gone.  I just saw this.  So I wonder what did you do?

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