Post # 1
I recently found out I was pregnant. I’m guessing I’m about 4 1/2 weeks along. I have yet to see the doctor, but I’m pretty sure I will be due mid-September. If this is the case it will be 1-2 weeks before I am supposed to be a bridesmaid in my brother’s wedding. I have no idea what to expect with the delivery and/or the recovery afterwards. I wondered if anyone knows if it would even be possible for me to attempt to be part of his wedding? I am so excited to be pregnant, but I feel horrible because of the timing. I am really hoping I will be one of those women that feel great within a few days. Anyone have any advice????
Post # 3
as long as the baby comes on time, you should be fine! most women feel fine after a few days — recovery is longer if you have a c-section.
Post # 4
@Illinois Bride: sorry, I clearly put this is the wrong section…should have been in ‘nesting’
Post # 5
@kitzy: That’s what I’m hoping for! Thank you!
Post # 6
While I’d love to reassure you, I”m not so sure. Not all babies come on time. If the wedding is a week after your due date, you may still be pregnant…or be in labor on his wedding day.
While some people snap back to normal right after having a baby, not all do. My mom weighed 102 pounds when she was discharged from the hospital after having me, which was about 5 pounds less then when she got pregnant. She wore her jeans home.
But not everyone bounces back immediately. I FELT fine by the day after I gave birth (just a bit sore, nothing major), but I was (TMI alert) leaking milk at random times, my breast were HUGE, and my body in no way would have fit into a bridesmaid dress for several weeks afterwards. I wore maternity clothes home. That was a shocker for me.
I actually was pregnant when I got fitted for a Bridesmaid or Best Man dress for my cousin’s wedding. The wedding was when my daughter was 3 months old and everything was fine. But I am not sure it would have worked out had it been 3 weeks after her birth.
Post # 7
After I gave birth, I was in huge amounts of pain for several days, none of the pain was due to what happened, it was my uterus shrinking back to size. Also, if the due date is 1-2 weeks before the wedding and this is your first child, you’ll most likely pass the due date with nothing happening. When you’re ready to tell people, I’d talk to the friend.
Post # 8
Also remember that babies need to eat every couple hours at that point, and feeding can take 30 minutes. A friend of mine just gave birth three weeks ago, and there were points during those first couple weeks when she only had about an hour between finishing one feeding and starting another.
Post # 9
Everyone’s different. I had easy, fast deliveries with no tearing or episiotomy and was back to normal in no time. I left the hospital in my pre-maternity jeans (I put on my maternity jeans and they were huge! I had to send Darling Husband home to get my pre-maternity jeans) and felt great. I was more tired than sore or uncomfortable.
However, my former SIL took a good 2 weeks to bounce back after her delivery with episiotomy due to pain. And she was still in maternity clothes when her baby was 1 mo. old.
Post # 10
You wont know until you get there, but my best friend was a bridesmaid in my wedding 11 days after she gave birth to her son. She was such a trooper. I got engaged just after she found out she was pregnant and hadn’t told anyone yet. She called me to tell me her secret so that we wouldn’t plan our wedding too close to her due date (which we were kind of planning to do). We planned the wedding for 20 post due date and of course she went a week or so past her due date. But she made it! She had her mil at the wedding to help care for the baby.
Post # 11
i honestly wouldnt risk it and would probably back out of the wedding…
Post # 12
I would think about backing out as a Bridesmaid or Best Man and just attend the wedding as a guest. That way if something does come up and you can’t attend it doesn’t mess them up.
I agree with others that you may go past your due date and the baby could be born much closer to the wedding. Do you have to travel for the wedding?
Post # 13
I would talk to your friend. I think it would depend on a few things, like if you are traveling for the wedding, specifically when your due date is versus the wedding date, and the flexibility of the bride.
I would say you most likely won’t want to be traveling very far at all for a wedding 1-2 weeks after giving birth. Also, your due date is not exact, and might be adjusted when you go to the dr. Mine was moved up 9 days at my first ultrasound. If the bride is flexible and willing to wait and see, you might not have to make a decision just yet. But if she is very specific about how the bridal party looks for photos and wants an answer immediately, you should probably back out and attend as a guest.
Post # 14
I’m not in a wedding, but my cousins wedding is 2 weeks to the day after my due date. I know im just a guest, but we’re close and wouldnt want to miss it. Fortunately we’re all in the same city… but Im so afraid im going to give birth 3 days before the wedding or something… EEk!
So if i were you …to aleviate some of the stress…I would back out of being a bridesmaid and stick to being a guest.
Post # 15
My baby was one week late, and I was still sore a week after that and I didn’t have a C section. You’re cutting it close and I wouldn’t do it if it was me. Even if you can go, you’ll likely be really tired, and still could be sore. I say back out to save yourself he stress, but do what you feel is best for you!
Post # 16
First, I say stop worrying and enjoy the moment while you wait for confirmation and a date from your doctor…this is a special time for you to be excited and you shouldn’t be worrying about someone else’s wedding months and months away (plenty of time for her to change things up). I get the guilt factor, but this is one of those times you’re allowed to be a little “selfish”.
Once you do have confirmation, I think the right thing to do (and best way to keep a SIL relationship good) is to graciously back out. Your SIL will have enough to stress about before the wedding that the last thing she needs to worry about late in the game is whether or not you’ll be able to attend and if you’ll fit into a dress. She’ll have to understand your baby doesn’t care about her schedule. Even if you do end up being able to attend, just attending as a guest may be taxing enough.