Post # 1
So, my SO has been engaged twice before. Once, when he was very young and his heart wasn’t in it. He was trying to save this girl from ridicule from her family or something. I’m not positive about the whole story because I don’t really care.
The other engagement was more serious, they had dated for about 6 years and were living together. She broke off the engagement because it just wasn’t “right” and he agreed. We started dating shortly after that.
I’m not upset about his history but I also don’t love it. It makes me worry that he doesn’t take marriage seriously or that he just wants to get married so bad that he’s willing to marry someone he doesn’t really love. He is ready to marry me now but I’m the one forcing us to wait. I know he loves me more than these other women but I want to wait just because I’m young and don’t see the point of rushing.
So anyways, he has 2 engagement rings that he has been trying to sell. As most of you know, diamond rings are basically worthless once taken out of the store. Jewelers have offered him about $1,000 for rings that he bought for a combined $8,000. He has offered to make me another piece of jewelry from these rings and I don’t know how I feel about it. It is, no doubt, weird to wear diamonds that were once his fiance’s engagement ring. However, diamonds are diamonds are diamonds, right? Again, I’m confident that he loves me more than these women.
So my question to the hive: How would you feel about jewelry that was once your SO’s ex-fiance?
Post # 3
I’d do it. But then I am very practical. But if you think it will bother you, the financial savings is just not worth it.
If it were me, I’d have the diamonds reset into something I loved. Remember, YOU are the one he will actually marry…you got both him AND their rings!
Post # 4
id feel a little bit weird about it but i think i would take the stone and put in a new ring. i dont think i could wear the exact same ring that had been on another woman’s finger without changes
Post # 5
I consider myself practical, too, but I would never do it. I would be really weirded/creeped out about it and it would probably be a constant reminder every time I looked at that jewelry that there were 2 other girls he thought worthy enough of a proposal before me.
I am a very jealous person though..
Post # 6
Could you perhaps use one of the rings as a trade-in somewhere? Sometimes jewelers are willing to give you closer to what you actually paid for the ring if you’re using the value toward something in their store. I had an engagement ring that I kept from a past fiance of mine (because I paid for it) and SO and I were able to use it as a trade-in, providing what we bought was twice the value of the first ring.
I would never want to actually wear anything that belonged to an ex, though. I didn’t even want to wear any part of a ring from my own broken engagement, so I can’t imagine wanting to wear something that belonged to my SO’s ex.
In the end, do what you think is the best for your situation, of course. 🙂
Post # 7
I attach meaning to things… I don’t think I’d be able to do it without being reminded of his exes 🙁
Post # 8
Here are pictures of the rings, they are really beautiful. Sorry I’m terrible at taking pictures
Post # 9
@Azalea_Bee: I’d use them! I have no problem with it. I don’t believe in the whole “bad energy” thing. And it will save money! I’m practical that way.
Post # 10
The only way I would wear it is if it were a ring that was passed down through the family and the ex-FI gave it back to him since it was a family ring and has meaning. Otherwise hell no, I’d want my very own.
Post # 11
Edited to say: I’d use them to make another ring. And every time I looked at my ring I’d think ‘Ha bitches, he chose me!’
Post # 12
I would not use the rings. Just sell them on DiamondBistro or kajiji. Why start a new engagement with old memories. I don’t understand why he bothered holding on to them.
Post # 13
I would at the very least have the center stone reset into something else. Most likely I would try to trade them in for something completely new. I think it’s a personal thing and if it doesn’t bother you then go for it! No judgement here 🙂
Post # 14
I’d use them. I’m practical and would see it as nothing more than money saved for us. He’s already spent the money, you now have pretty shiny diamonds, might as well make the best of it. Spending more money on new diamonds isnt going to erase the past. The future is the future with or without already bought diamonds being used.
Post # 15
@PinkPandaBear: lol. I bet they would like you if they met you on the street and recognized the ring.
@Azalea_Bee: I was going to say no, but I really like the 3 stone halo ring. Are they very different from what you would want if you could pick your own ring? Generally I wouldn’t mind that much if they were set as earrings/necklace but as my engagement ring would be weird.
Post # 16
I’d be more concerned about marrying someone who’s been engaged 3 times than using the jewelry. Save the money! And make sure you guys have talked through the whole previous engagement thing…yikes!