Post # 1
i need some advice please!!!!
i trawled lots of shops searching for ‘the one’ but nothing felt right it felt like i was pretending at being a bride to be, strange i know but nothing suited me untill i tried on a ruby red gown in a local bridal shop and that was it, i immediately felt excited and cant wait for our wedding day, its stunning.
heres the dilemma, my fiance saw a wedding pogramme of a bride in a red gown and said he hated it that it wasnt really what brides should wear, etc etc…. i have been married before and so has future hubby so can understand if it was 1st time round tradition
gutted is not the word, my mum and friends who know keep telling me he will love me in whatever i wear but now i cant get it out of my mind, any advice guys????????? help!!!!
Post # 3
Maybe you could wear the red dress for the reception and a white dress for the ceremony so you get your dress but he gets to see you first in his idea of a traditional white dress.
Post # 4
@Aumuller: thanks, thats not a bad thought, although we are on a tight budget and dont know how i could budget for another dress, its awful as the dress makes me feel so confident and good yet i wouldnt want him to be disapointed.
Post # 5
Talk to him about it. In the end I am sure he will think you are gorgeous and doubt he will want you in something you don’t feel comfortable in.
Post # 6
GO WITH THE RED!!!!
Your family is right and if we all listened to what the Fiance thought would or wouldn’t look good on us imagine what would happen? Half of us would look like hookers and the other half would be in sweats and ponytails.
I understand that it’s his wedding day too and that you want him to think you are the most amazing thing ever, but he already thinks that or he wouldn’t have asked you in the first place!
Post # 7
I like the idea of getting another white dress for the ceremony and keeping your red dress for the reception. I realize budgets are tight (my dress was crazy cheap. lol) But maybe you can go for something a bit less formal, but still white for the ceremony. I’ve see lots of inexpensive dresses on Davids Bridal or you could look for a preowned dress that could fit in your budget. I mean, it doesn’t have to be crazy especially since the ceremony only lasts a little while. Then you can let your red dress shine for the rest of the reception!
Post # 8
I’ll second (or third or whatever) the two dress suggestion – white for the ceremony, red for the reception!
Post # 9
Another white dress. Maybe you can just get an inexpensive white dress like a white Bridesmaid or Best Man dress or prom dress.
Post # 10
thanks guys for the comments, its certainly food for thought.
Post # 11
When he sees you wearing that red dress, he wont be thinking “oh she doesnt look like a bride” guys say things in general that dont always apply to you personally. I would stick with the red dress
Post # 12
I know you probably want to surprise your man on your wedding day with what your dress looks like, but I think it’d be wise to let him know you’re planning on wearing a red dress. He might completely change his mind – it could have just been a momentary reaction he was voicing before. Once he hears how excited you are to wear red, he’ll have to think it over a lot more carefully, and I’d bet there’s at least a decent chance he’ll come around to think of it differently once he associates a red wedding dress with the personality of the woman he loves.
As for the matter of partially ruining the surprise by telling him, well, most grooms already know their brides will be wearing white/ivory, so it’s not really letting anything out of the bag to tell him you’ll be wearing a gorgeous red dress – and that he should prepare himself to admire you in it.
Post # 13
@mwitter80:thanks, that made me laugh but so true, i should trust in my own feelings and go with what i felt in the shop, i really want to keep it a surprise from everyone until the day (except mum and a couple of friends) so discussing it with him isnt an option. oh i wish i was more decisive!!!
Post # 14
A bit off-topic…: I LOVE red gowns. Wouldn’t you like to show us your dress?
Post # 15
I’d keep the red. You could argue that only virgins are suppose to wear white or that wedding gowns use to be blue and other colors because most women couldn’t afford the white fabric because it needed cleaned more. My dress is going to be coffee/latte
Talk to him. Tell him how you feel like you are not a white wedding dress gal and that you like the color gowns. Good luck!
Post # 16
I agree that you should talk to him about it. Maybe enlighten him about the history of why white dresses are worn. Prior to Queen Victoria, white was rarely worn for a wedding: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_wedding
It says: “Royal brides before Victoria did not typically wear white, instead choosing ‘heavy brocaded gowns embroidered with white and silver thread,’ with red being a particularly popular color in Western Europe more generally.”
If he still maintains that you should wear white, then see if he’ll compromise by letting you wear the red dress to the reception like others suggested.