Post # 1
My sister (and she brought my mother into it with her) is refusing to rent the tux my fiance picked out. It’s $160, which is $60 more than it was for my brothers wedding 6 years ago, so her and my mother are refusing to rent it. They are driving me insane! They went out and BOUGHT shoes to go with it (for $50) because “it should make it cheaper” um no, the place we’re getting them from includes the shoes for free. She’s sending me all these websites that rent out tuxes for $100. What if they don’t get here in time?
Her husband is the best man. The vest we picked out is a pattern and if he gets it somewhere else he wont fit in and will look stupid.. WHY do they have to be so difficult?! They have the money, they just want to be as cheap as possible. The ONLY reason she is putting up a fight is because my brothers wedding was cheaper- SIX YEARS AGO AND IN NOVEMBER!! I’m getting married early June! And they (her and my mom) keep telling me that I HAVE to find it cheaper somewhere else! It’s not my problem! I’m stressed out enough as it is!
Did anyone else have this problem?! What did you do?! Do you just let them look stupid and not match everyone else?!
Post # 2
She doesn’t need to rent it, right? Talk to the best man about it and not your sister.
Post # 3
lizzimi: If you have to, you can bring a family therapist into this.
Post # 4
They’re acting petty, yes. However, some of us would argue that adults dressing in matching clothes is a lot more stupid looking than mismatched outfits.
Post # 5
eh, there are plenty of mismatched bridesmaids these days, a mismatched best man isn’t the end of the world.
Post # 6
lizzimi: If you want everyone to match, I guess it is your problem. Did you ask everyone in the wedding party what their budget was before choosing attire? That should have been your first step and should have avoided issues like this…
Post # 7
Just offer to pay the extra $60 and be done with it. It’s really not worth the stress to try to MacGuyver something, and it’s not a large amount of money.
Post # 8
Penang1885: I agree, just pay the $60 difference.
Sorry, but it *is* your problem because it’s your wedding. Also, if you chose a wedding in peak season when tuxes are more expensive, why should they pay the difference? The same with you choosing a $160 tux instead of a $100 tux – why should they pay the difference when you chose the nicer tux for your wedding and your wedding photos?
I can only see two options: pay the $60 difference, or get a new best man.
Post # 9
$100 6 years ago is equal to more than $100 today. They should consider inflation before they complain.
Post # 10
$160 is NOT a lot considering that bridesmaid dresses are usually waaaay more if not equivalent and do not come with shoes, makeup and hair or jewlery. I don’t think it’s to much to add considering the female always pays more for beauty. Maybe bring this point up and tell them they are lucky to get off so cheap as men
Post # 11
They’re really going to do the tit-for-tat thing? OK. $100 in 2008 is $109.75 today. (http://data.bls.gov/cgi-bin/cpicalc.pl?cost1=100&year1=2008&year2=2014)
ETA: Some Bees talk about mis-matched BMs, and that’s perfectly fine for Bridesmaid or Best Man and/or Groomsmen. But I think then all the Groomsmen would need to be mis-matched. It sounds like this would be a classic Sesame Street “one of these things is not like the other.”
Post # 12
They do sound unreasonable, but unfortunately, this actually is your problem. They aren’t required to do anything for you. If they really won’t pay more than $100 and it’s that important to you, you should probably cough up the extra $60.
Post # 13
- Wedding: June 2014 - San Francisco, CA
Not worth your emotional energy, hon. Either pay the difference or accept that it will be mismatched – you can’t OBLIGATE someone else to spend XYZ amount of money on anything, even if it’s your “special day.”
Post # 14
- Wedding: August 2013 - Wynn Las Vegas
It sucks, but if I were you I would find a cheaper one to pacify them or pay the difference myself.
Post # 15
lizzimi: I’d just offer to pay the difference to cut through the BS. Even though its not right, its the best way to get what you want.