Post # 1
We are both in our forties, first marriage, and we are combining two entire households into one. There’s not much we need! We feel very fortunate and we really don’t want gifts from anyone. I realize it’s just part of getting married, I would never show up to a wedding without a gift. But really, we don’t need anything… I am being told we must register- I guess mostly for the comfort of our mothers friends. Of course, there are some very nice things we don’t have, but I would never do the thing where everything on the list is over $100. What do you think?
Post # 3
I would at least register for a few things, otherwise you run the risk of getting a bunch of stuff you really don’t want, since people will buy gifts no matter what 🙂
Post # 4
Interesting dilemma. I don’t think we will register, since we have what we need too (48 and 49 here). We may find a website that has things for a green home, or something travel related since we both like foreign travel. I don’t mean, Hi, folks, pay for our honeymoon! Just cool travel things we would use on our next trip, maybe from Norm Thompson or something. Congratulations on your new life together!
Post # 5
You could always register for a honeymoon, or I’ve even seen ads for registering for houses. You could ask for people to donate to charity instead. Otherwise you could start replacing things. We don’t need much, but we’re getting new sheets since ours are a little worn and things like that.
Post # 6
@michelle86 – that’s a good idea about registering for things you need to replace, like sheets and such. I’ll keep that in mind.
Post # 7
I went to a wedding like that……
…….on the invite they said something like: ‘Your presence is our present. Please do not get us a gift, but if you insist, we would love a contribution to our wine cellar.’
Post # 8
We’re not registering because we’ve both been married before, already live together and are in our 40’s. We’re hoping that means we’ll get money – something we (and everyone else on the planet) can use! I always give money for weddings and I’mnot expecting to have a shower. If I were though I’d register for new towels, sheets, pans, etc. Some of our stuff is OLD!
Post # 9
We’re using a honeymoon registry. They let you basically make up stuff you want but isn’t tangible or practical to buy outright, like a day of scuba diving or a nice bottle of wine while on the honeymoon. That way instead of being locked into a store, we can combine physical stuff we need (like a new vac) with aforementioned experiential gifts. We’re using Traveler’s Joy.
Post # 10
- Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch
I would definitely register somewhere! Even if it’s just a honeymoon registry, or a non-trad Amazon.com registry. And even then, I’d still pick a B&M. Why? My mom and step-dad got married this summer and didn’t register because, combining two households, they DEFINITELY had everything already. People bought her a bunch of candlestick holders and picture frames; all random stuff that didn’t match anything they had. People will buy you stuff even if you don’t want stuff, so you might as well tell them what to get. And people will often want to walk into a store to buy it.
Ugh, good luck!
Post # 11
As someone who LOVES buying off of registries and is really uncomfortable with cash and gift cards, I really recommend a registry. You could always go with a hobby related one, or the wine cellar idea (cute!). A few traditional gifts might be nice (400+ thread sheets = heaven), but I don’t think you should feel limited. REI would be a good choice for outdoors and travel related stuff. And if you really want to make it clear that gifts are fine, but not a big deal, I do think adding a charity is a great idea.
Post # 12
I’m 40 and my Fiance is 43 and we’re registering for a few things. Like you, we have established households, but need a few things that are “us” like new sheets, towels, and some crystal replacement pieces for over the years we’ve dropped a few pieces when moving!
Not much and yes, we feel blessed too, but we’re going to give our guests directions as to what we’d like to have as they’ll bring gifts…I know these people lol!
Post # 13
Sorry to dissent, but I don’t think the ‘your presence is our present’ thing really works–I’ve seen too many people use it an ‘aw, you shouldn’t have’ kind of way….followed by 4 overflowing registries, so sometimes it just doesn’t seem sincere.
We said we don’t need gifts, but if you want to give something, please select the charity *of your choice* and make a donation. We gave 3 charities we lke, in case people didn’t have one they like. Now here’s the part I found suprising….most people actually heeded our wish and gave to a whole slew of charities. We got very few gifts, and the charities they chose were very, very varied. So, if that appeals to you, give it a whirl! (Your mileage may vary.)
Post # 14
We struggled with the decision to register (age 43 and 55). We decided to go ahead and do it. I think it is a good idea. I love to cook, so we registered for many kitchen appliances that were on our (my-LOL) wish list. I usually give a gift card to the place someone is registered to anyway. Most of our guests will give us cash or gift cards so we do not relaly expect anyone to buy a “gift”. We just bought a house and really could use updated basics, towels, sheets, etc.
I would register, just to give those an idea of what you want. If you already have china, register for accessories or another pattern to compliment the exisitng one, etc. I’m not a big fan of a honeymoon registry, but that is just my opinion.
Post # 15
In our 40s, combined households 2 years ago and just moved into a new house 6 months ago and bought a lot of new stuff for the new house. But I dont want the mismatched candlesticks and picture frames, so we registered. When I spun it like that my Fiance was way into it. We registered for reasonably priced items to stock our bar we are building next year when we finish the basement. Our friends are now annoyed because everything is under $30!?!