(Closed) Registry dilema

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

IMO theres no “good” way to tell people what to give you. If people want to bring you gifts I dont see how you can tell them not to.

Post # 5
928 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Word of mouth. Have your mom and his mom tell your family and friends that while their presence is enough, if they would like to buy something to please just give money as the couple is not registering.

The thing about registering is that you have to add an address where you would like to have your gifts shipped and if a guest buys online, it will sent to wherever you would like it to go. Also, you can mention when you’re telling guests about wedding presents that if they would like to buy a present to please send it or leave it at the certain address (s).

Do you have a wedding website? That’s a good way to spread information to people, although you have to remind people to look at it so send out emails or put it on your save the dates.

Also, it’s not like that at all when people ask for money, it’s more a cultural thing. People want to give the couple some sort of wedding gift and money can be the easiest thing to do. In the North, people usually only bring gifts to the shower and everyone brings money to the wedding. In the South, people bring gifts. Money is great because you can buy exactly what you want.

Hope this helps!

Post # 7
994 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

There’s been a few posts about this very recently. To sum it up — NOPE, no way in our culture can you ask for cash versus physical gifts. However, where it’s a Destination Wedding, I think it does make sense to ask that gifts are sent to your home. I hope a wording expert can help you with that. And any info about gifts can not be on the actual invite. Put it on a seperate card. Hope This Helps.

Post # 9
1036 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I am also having a dilemma with our registry.  I am not including anything about a registry with the wedding or reception invites, but plan to personally respond to all RSVP’s (we are using an email account setup for the wedding) with registry details, travel and hotel information, maps, etc. 


Here is my registry question.  Fiance and I have been together for 11 years, and really don’t ‘need’ any of the typical wedding gift items.  There are a few items we would like that are Bed, Bath and Beyond type things and a few things that Fiance would like in the outdoor relm from his favorite camping/hiking store, however, there aren’t really enough of those things combined to create registries (unless we had a registry with under 10 things on it).  Is that okay to do?  Also, the one desperate need we have is new furniture.  Is there a way to word that the couple could use gift cards to our favorite local furniture store?

Post # 10
186 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

lol i’m belgian too 

and really it’s not a big deal to ask for cash 🙂

just tell you guests the reason you don’t want physical gift (destination wed … ) 

don’t worry 

Post # 13
1066 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011


I would just register for the few things at BBB, and then you could also include a note that “Gift cards from ____________ store would also be appreciated”

Something like that.

Post # 14
4109 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

@Atalanta: I guess so, but I posted the link more for the wording. It’s a really neat idea, but the wishing wells are just a big fancy card box if you ask me 🙂

Post # 15
1160 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

If you have a wedding website that’s the perfect place for it.

I gotta say though, the “skinny piggy bank” mental image is cracking me up…

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