(Closed) Registry…struggling.

posted 7 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 3
9123 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

If you want to do a honeymoon registry, just do it.  Some people might think it’s tacky, but they don’t have to use it. 

I just kept telling my fiance, “This is the household stuff we’ll be using FOR LIFE!  This is our ONE CHANCE to get decent stuff!”  Which sounds overly dramatic, but we are pretty frugal and wouldn’t buy matching plates, nice pots, etc etc for ourselves.  Eventually it stuck.  Repetition is the key, and he will bend to your will eventually 😉

Post # 5
1108 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@MissBatman:  Have you considered registering at some non-traditional stores?  If there is a store that you and your Fiance frequent (i.e. an outdoors store if you are campers, a sporting-goods store if you are into sports, etc) you could register there for things you do need, and things that your Fiance might be more excited about.

I am in the same boat as you in that my Fiance and I already live together and we have a lot of items already which we would have registered for otherwise.  For things likes sheets and towels, you can really never have enough of those, and it doesnt mean you need to get rid of what you have.  Try taking your Fiance with you when you register so he can actually see all the nice new items… it may make him realize how nice it would be to replace or add to what you have now.

Are there any larger items, like patio furniture or a BBQ, that you could put on your registry for people to go in on together?

Post # 6
2701 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Haha!  I had this problem with H when we registered.  He couldn’t understand why we needed to upgrade.  I explained to him that we’re adults now, and we should get the nicer stuff that will last us for years and not just deal with the cheap stuff we bought in college to get by.  I think I sort of swayed him, but mostly I just told him, “No, we need X, I’m going to register for X.  We might not need it right now, but in the future, we will.  Trust me.” 


But it is a balancing act.  I would have liked new flatware, but we already had some that was nice enough so I didn’t push it.  As long as what we had was quality and functioned correctly, I didn’t bother.  But I did want matching plates, nice glasses, more wine glasses, new towels and bathroom set, and china (H totally didn’t understand why I wanted china) so that’s what we registered for.  We also planned to expand.  In the next few years to we plan to have kids, so we’ll need more than just a handful of unmatching plates.  We also like to have parties and family come visit so we’ll need enough wine glasses and a bigger coffee maker and more towels.

Also, PP had a good point: you can register for non-traditional stuff too.  We registered for camping gear and REI and tools at Sears.  But I would strongly advise against doing a honeymoon registry.  Honeymoon registries are dressed up cash registries and are rude.  Some people don’t mind them, but they do offend/put off a lot of people.  So it’s best just not to do it.  Regardless of what and how much you regsiter for, people will ALWAYS give cash.  We had a large physical registery and at least half of our gifts were still cash.

Post # 7
786 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

i feel its called a “BRIDAL SHOWER” for a reason….hes not the bride….so go for it!

we are doing a co-ed shower so i kinda have to suck it up and approve of the golf stand and other useless things (that i will never use) and he will also suck it up that i will be getting “crap” he will never use…


but its your shower, and 225 people…shoot…do what you want everything new- i live with my Fiance and im asking few new everything in the kitchen. his ex-fi bought most of it and i still use it, i tell him all the time “dinner sucked because it was her baking dish” or whatever…ha but i dont have money to buy everything new myself so registry it goes! 

Post # 8
2899 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

This is what I said to my fiance when we were registering:

“Honey, I know you think this stuff is dumb and you would rather have cash. But I’m having two bridal showers and people don’t bring cash to those, plus some people just don’t like giving cash at weddings. So we can either pick out stuff we actually want, or we can let people pick out stuff for us and risk winding up with 500 tea kettles and 30 ugly serving platters that we then have to take to the Salvation Army after faking enthusiasm in our thank you notes.”

He said, “You know what? You’re right. Register for the highball glasses.”

Post # 9
9878 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’d just add stuff online when he’s not looking, haha!

Post # 10
288 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@MissBatman:  Go with your girlfriends and SCAN AWAY! My Fiance and I live together so we both have crappy stuff from college and I CANNOT WAIT to register! We’ve narrowed it down to two great stores but when worse comes to worse, just scan that extra gravy bowl and you can always return for a gift card to use later! It’s better to have too much than too little and then scurry at the last minute to add on to your registry, especially if you have three showers! Enjoy! 🙂

Post # 11
2959 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Wynn Las Vegas

View original reply
@Westwood:  +1

Post # 12
11231 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

View original reply
@Westwood:  LOL this is what I ended up doing. I DID take his tastes into consideration, and he DID come with me a couple of times, but he was just not interested.

Post # 13
12244 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

Haha, my DH was so into registering he held the gun the whole time!

We ended up getting 90% cash, anyway!

I would get Fiance to go with you, and show him the REALLY cool things they make! My DH went CRAZY for the toaster that makes eggs and the Roomba. Oh my God, he seriously spent 6 months going Room-ba, Room-ba. Room-ba, Room-ba!


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