(Closed) Regrets..should i change MOH’s?

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
1940 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I think it would cause a lot of drama to change people’s titles now.  After all, all 3 girls stand up there with you – Maid/Matron of Honor is really just a title (at least to me).  And asking your childhood best friend to be your Maid/Matron of Honor 12 days before the wedding might be awkward for her too.  Personally, I would just go with it as is and focus on bigger things.

Post # 4
Member
4001 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

To be honest, I wouldn’t do anything.  Its unfortunate that she has disappointed you.  This could end up turning ugly and who needs that right before their wedding?    My BM’s were pretty much a hot mess toward the end, aside from 2.5 of them but I didn’t say anything.  If I had, it would of caused me more stress than it was worth.  But if the relationship is worth saving to you, I’d address it later on, after the wedding.  You don’t want to harbor resentment by never saying how you feel when it might just be something you guys can get past if you spoke about it.  But for now, just keep faith that she’ll be able to be there on your day. 

Post # 5
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

My Maid/Matron of Honor (I had a Matron and a Maid) did this to me.  I decided to leave it as was and if she showed up to the wedding great and if not her loss not mine.  My Maid/Matron of Honor was prego and was having complications so I understood her hesitation to travel or stand-up for a long time.  I just didn’t cause any waves and went about enjoying my time with everyone else.  As it turned out she made it to the wedding and stood there with me.  She’s one of my closest friends and I knew that if I had reacted differently then we would no longer be friends and I just couldn’t see that being an option.

Post # 6
Member
529 posts
Busy bee

It is late to change things. You could put both maids in the program under the Maid/Matron of Honor title and tell your friend you felt it was silly to have distinctions with just three BMs. Good luck.

Post # 7
Member
9 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2010

It’s your wedding and your true feelings. Those titles were given for a reason and with alot of meaning. If that person isn’t living up to it in your mind then change it. You don’t have to deal with none of the backlash because this event is about what you want and how you want it. IF she is a true friend, she will understand. I went through a similar situation and it turned out fine.

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