(Closed) Rehearsal Dinner

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
5655 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2011

Fiance parents aren’t willing to plan/organize/pay for it?

Fiance and I have paid for pretty much the whole wedding but His mom and sis has put together the rehearsal dinner…

Post # 4
Member
5118 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I would sort of be put off as a bridesmaid or groomsman at having to pay for part of the meal. Could you maybe do something more laid back/casual than a plated dinner somewhere? I think we plan to do a grill-out and provide some punch and snacks and such. It could really likely be done for half of what you’re looking at now, maybe even under $100, and then you’ll be able to treat your guests and have some hang-out time. 

The other alternative I would be ok-ish with as a bridal party member would be to have the rehearsal at a non-dinner time (like 2 or even 3) and then just let everyone know that you’re planning to go out to X Restaurant afterwards and that anyone who would like to is welcome to come along if they’d like. Then it would seem that they’re choosing to come along, and they would know to pay (I would think).

Post # 6
Member
1328 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Can’t you host it at someone’s home and get pizza or take-out?  maybe even grill out?  I would be kinda put off as well if I had to cough up $$ for the Rehearsal Dinner.

Post # 7
Member
1328 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@xshellx2003:  in that case, I’d say your best option would be to follow @indibee: ‘s advice about telling everyone where you’re going after rehearsal and anyone who wants to come is welcome!

Post # 9
Member
5118 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@xshellx2003: I’m not sure how April is in Ohio, but could you do a camp fire, story-telling/catching up, lawn games kind of night? That’s relatively cheap (or free, depending on who has lawn games), and even if it needs to be inside, there are all sorts of games to play that gets your group together and having a good time. We played tons of minute to win it games during our big NYE party, and most of those things are household items like cups, water, paper clips, marshmellows, cotton balls, etc., or card games, mad libs, catch phrase, etc. 

Post # 10
Member
2154 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Pizza party? I love pizza.

Post # 11
Member
174 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@xshellx2003:

Fiance and I are struggling with this as well – here’s what we’ve come up with.

We’re doing lunch and then having our rehearsal; that way we figure it cuts down the cost. And yes, Fiance and I are paying for everyone’s meals; I don’t think we’d feel right inviting people and then asking them to pay. If we had a larger place we’d gladly just have a BBQ…

Oh – and if you’re looking for something fun to do the night before the wedding…I’m working on that too on a budget. I’m thinking games, music, snacks, drinks, I’m hitting up discount stores/Target for game prizes, and you could even do a white elephant gift thing. Then there’s always the dollar store/99c store for decorations. I think the main thing is having everyone together, having fun, however you do that.

The day after the wedding we are having brunch, and just telling people where we’ll be so they can join us if they want; doing it that way we don’t feel we’re hosting and obligated to pay. It does get expensive, all this stuff.

Post # 12
Member
374 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

Friends of ours did dinner at the church after the rehearsal.  They ordered pizza and wings.  It was fun.  You could do something like at a parents house or your own.  Nothing breaks out the cornhole set quicker in ohio than good weather, pizza and wings. 🙂

Post # 12
Member
646 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I don’t think you can really ask your guests to kick in for the rehearsal dinner… It’s really supposed to be a “thank you” for all of the help. I agree with the other posters, can you do a casual back-yard something?

Or, is there a pizza place/arcade? It probably wouldn’t be too expensive to order a bunch of pizzas for the group. People could then pay for their own arcade games.

Post # 14
Member
646 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

What about a public park? A lot of times the park department will rent out the shelters for next to nothing. You just bring the food and plop it on the grill.

Post # 15
Member
374 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

That’s true.  The metro park system (I’m guessing you’re in NE Ohio?) rents their pavilions pretty cheap and they have grills. 🙂

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