Post # 1
I am having a wedding, and I would say about 75% of the wedding guests are from out of town. My mom thinks I need to invite all the out of town guests to the rehearsal dinner, but I feel like if I invite all of them it’s going to turn into a “mini wedding” on Friday night, not to mention cost a fortune for my in laws. I already have about 35-40 people just with parents, attendants, and their significant others. I think it should be okay, if I just keep it small, but my mom thinks I am being rude.
Post # 3
Your not. The rehersal dinner is just for the people in the wedding party and you and your FI’s immediate family. Thats it!
Post # 4
Only people at the rehearsal and their SOs really need to be invited to the dinner.
Post # 4
I don’t think it’s necessary to invite Out of Town guests. It’s nice, sure, but not necessary.
Post # 5
You absolutely do not have to invite all the OOT’s. They are coming to town for your wedding, not your rehearsal dinner. They are perfectly capable of entertaining themselves for one meal. Many of them might prefer smaller get togethers anyhow.
The rehearsal dinner traditionally was held to thank the attendants for their time and support and for the two families to meeet, if they hadn’t done so already.
Post # 6
I’m in a similar situation: so we’re inviting the folks who came in from out of state, which are significantly fewer in number than the rest of the lot.
Post # 7
I do not think it’s necessary. We are going to have quite a few Out of Town guests also but I already discussed this with Fiance and we both agree that only the wedding party and people that are needed at the rehersal will be invited to the rehersal dinner. As an Out of Town guest I would not be expecting to be invited to the rehersal dinner!
Post # 9
No way, just the people at your rehearsal and their dates. That’s the rehearsal dinner. 🙂
Post # 10
Definitely not – about 95% of our guests are from out of town. We have no wedding party, so we’re not having a rehersal dinner really – but we are sponsoring a 2 hour ‘Welcome Cocktails’ on Friday night for everyone to hang out ahead of time. While it does certainly cost money to do this, it shouldn’t be too crazy. I’m looking forward to hanging out with friends and family in a more relaxed atmosphere – before the craziness of the Wedding day begins.
Post # 11
About 80% of our guests are coming from out of town and there is just no way we could have afforded to invite them all to the rehearsal dinner. That would almost basically be having 2 wedding receptions lol.
I’m just inviting those in the wedding party and close family.
Post # 12
Thank you for posting this. I was thinking we needed to invite all the Out of Town guests too. Looks like the answer is no… WOOHOO! Money saved.
Post # 13
Our wedding required travel for all attending except for Mother-In-Law.
We decided to make a “wedding weekend” out of it since people were traveling from so far away (10+ hour flights). So we had a casual rehearsal dinner for everyone so they could “drop by when they got into town”. We also had a day after brunch for everyone to get some food and see us again before heading home.
Not everyone came to the dinner and brunch but our guests really enjoyed the option of having things to do both on Friday night and Sunday and I loved having more time with the guests, especially those from far away who we didn’t get to see often.
You definitely do not have to do it, but I was really happy that we did it (and I think our guests were too).
Post # 14
@arrein: You absolutely do not need to invite out of town guests to the RD! I would say just the wedding party and their guests, and your grandparents and parents and your FH’s grandparents and parents. 🙂
Post # 15
My boyfriend’s mom – MOG for her other son decided to say upfront she would pay for the rehersal dinner. All the Out of Town guests were invited. It was a rehersal dinner that cost her about 11K and had about 110 people in attendance. Open bar to boot. It was a mini wedding.
Not a good idea – do not invite Out of Town or the in laws will resent the hell out of you.