(Closed) Rehearsal Dinner Guest List

posted 6 years ago in Parties
Post # 2
Member
824 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

You are supposed to invite siblings and the officiant, but personally I feel like people need to plan events the way they want and not be too concerned with what you are “supposed to” do. In your case I would say do not invite your brother and SIL or the officiant if you don’t want to. 

Post # 3
Member
6518 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

View original reply
justwondering2015:  ive seen rehearsal dinners that have basically been like a mini wedding.

for our rehearsal dinner the only people invited were our parents, siblings, and the wedding party. 

I think it would be nice to invite your wedding planner! She could be a great help and give some pointers when you are doing your rehearsal. 

Post # 4
Member
779 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

The rehearsal dinner (to my understanding) is for the bridal party immediate family and out of town guests. I don’t think you would include an officiant who is essentially a vendor. As for the complicated relationship with your brother I am not sure you are obligated to invite people who are not invited to the wedding… I’m sure more etiquette oriented bees can be be more specific but that’s my understanding.

Post # 5
Member
2239 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

View original reply
justwondering2015:  We’re inviting our parent, grandparents, siblings (who are all in the bridal party), the other members of the bridal party (and their dates), our flower girl (and her mother and grandparents – my aunt and uncle), our officiant (who is a childhood friend of FI’s) and whoever we ask to do our reading (either my cousin or aunt). Plus my uncle who is hosting the rehearsal dinner at his townhouse. In total, it comes to 25 people.

We’re also having a welcome party type thing afterwards at a nearby bar for all of our out of town guests (around 75 people). 

Post # 6
Member
608 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

If I were you, I’d definitely invite the officiant and planner. See how they want things to flow, and they can be better prepared for the next day! 🙂 No need to invite people who are just going to be bored and complain and aren’t on good terms with you. They’re coming to the wedding anyway.

Post # 7
Member
174 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

I would also invite the officiant and wedding planner. We also are giving plus ones to our wedding party for the rehearsal dinner, but they are all traveling for the wedding.

Post # 8
Member
597 posts
Busy bee

My in laws hosted our rehearsal dinner and they did it the traditional way which was our immediate families, the bridal party and their significant others, and all out of town guests. In total we ended up having around 40 people. Now that I think about it, I feel like a jerk for not extending an invite out to our officiant. I think it would be a nice gesture to invite the officiant and the wedding planner!

Post # 9
Member
47458 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

In this case, I would not invite the officiant. For me it would be different if it were a minister or pastor with whom you had a relationship, but this would be like inviting a stranger to a famiily dinner.

I would invite the planner and your brother and sister-in-law. It’s always nice if you can take the high road.

Inviting OOT’s is purey optional.

Post # 11
Member
6518 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

View original reply
justwondering2015:  lol i agree. I would keep it as small as possible bc my outlook on rehearsal dinners is if you are not in the wedding party, then you dont need fo be there. Unless you have Out of Town guests, but even then I am on the fence about it bc what are they gonna do? Just sit and watch? 

Post # 12
Member
893 posts
Busy bee

I’d invite your brother and SIL. Even if you aren’t extremely close, it seems like the right thing to do since they’re immediate family.

i wouldn’t invite the officiant and I wouldn’t invite the wedding planner though.

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