(Closed) Rehearsal dinner is getting too large

posted 5 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
Member
3429 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@cali_cat:  I am dealing with this too:( Fiance doesn’t want to invite anyone not in the bridal party or their So’s. This is a source of contention between us. It all boils down to money. I feel guilty and stressed too. 🙁 I feel for you

Post # 4
Member
1177 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I don’t buy into the idea of inviting all the out of town guests if it’s a large number of people and makes the dinner unwieldy, which it sounds like yours would be.  If I did that my Rehearsal Dinner would be close to 45 people out of 75 guests, which is just kind of ridiculous. FWIW.

Post # 5
Member
2179 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

We dealt with the exact same thing. We stuck to wedding party, their SOs and our immediate family only. Our final rehearsal dinner number was 28, with 75 guests attending the wedding.

Post # 6
Member
2295 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I had the same issue – I couldn’t believe how fast it grew. Limit it – it’s fine not to include everyone coming in from out of town if there are a lot of them.

Post # 9
Member
3825 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

We’re looking at a final invite number of 70ish people. At present, our rehearsal dinner will only include parents and members of the wedding party and their SOs. Including us, we’re looking at 13 people. Perfect for a restaurant style dinner where I’m picking up the check at the end. Keeping it simple. 

When you’re having a small wedding, you should keep it simple by only inviting members of the wedding party and their SOs. I went to a very large rehearsal dinner before and I felt like it was a bit unnecessary as we saw ALL of the same people the next day at the wedding. 

Post # 10
Member
12955 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

We had 30 at the Rehearsal Dinner without getting into Out of Town guests.  Most of our wedding was out-of-towners, so we let them party together, and made certain to hang out with them all after the dinner at the hotel, too.

Post # 11
Member
3429 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@cali_cat:   We were hoping it would be under 1K. Like way under lol.  We wanted to do it at the hotel but they are way too expensive so we’re planning on a nearby restaurant.. I suppose if we could keep the cost down maybe we could consider inviting more? IDK I just feel rude not including certain people ya know?

 

Post # 12
Member
1880 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

We are having 170 attendees at our wedding and 64 at the rehearsal dinner. Yeah, it’s a lot of people (it’s traditional in my family to invite much of the extended family to the rehearsal dinner – if they had all come it would have been closer to 80 people). I wouldn’t worry too much about inviting out of town guests – I think most would not expect it. If you did, it would be nice, but if you can’t afford it, I don’t think they will be put out. (As I am not inviting out of town guests other than family, we are having a rehearsal dinner “after party” at my house, that’s basically just chilling out with other out of town guests. But our rehearsal dinner will be over by 8pm so that’s easy for us.)

 

Post # 15
Member
2179 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

@cali_cat:  No, it was fine. Had we invited out of towers, then it would have been weird. Since everyone there was IN the wedding, it was a good opportunity to catch up and relax before the big day. 

Post # 16
Member
1880 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@cali_cat:  Can you not arrange with the restaurant what is served? At ours, for a group we had several options – plated dinner from whatever choices we chose, several buffets, etc. We went with a fajita buffet because they’re one of my favorite foods, haha. So the price is the same per person. And then the drinks are a limited open bar with a flat price.

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