- 7 years ago
- Wedding: September 2011
I’m in a bind. We’re having children at our wedding because my children are in the wedding, plus we have a lot of family members with children. I never thought the rehearsal dinner would be a problem, but now it is.
My sister, who is a bridesmaid, has four children, ages 7, 9, 12, and 13. The older two are just fine, well behaved and the 13 year old will be a Guest Book attendant along with my FI’s 13 year old cousin. The younger two are monsters … not just monsters, but foul mouthed, aggressive, violent little boys. It’s no surprise to my sister – the entire family is vocal about their behavior, they’ve gone through more nannies than I can count on two hands and have been in a lot of trouble at school. When you go to their house, the youngest will greet you with a fist punch to the crotch and the 9 year old talks about sex and other inappropriate things that he knows nothing about. They will be at our wedding, and I’m okay with that (I don’t really have a choice).
My sister has now asked about the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner and she would like them to come. My gut immediately told her “NO” and now she seems upset with me. The last thing I need to worry about is her younger two running around at the rehearsal or being loud and aggressive. It would also be nice to have a nice rehearsal dinner without having to worry about them and what they may say or do. She lives in the same town that we do and her oldest has agreed to babysit them (so it’s not an issue of her having to travel or find a sitter).
BUT my children will be at the rehearsal and the rehearsal dinner (because they’re in the wedding) and more than likely, FI’s 5 year old nephew will also be there. He is not in the wedding but his mother is (FI’s sister) and the only other people that watch him are his grandmother and great grandmother who will also be at the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner.
Long story short, is this completely unfair on our part (excluding my sister’s kids) or is it understood considering her children are so misbehaved? We also have two additional people in the wedding party that do have children and their children are NOT coming.