Post # 1
My fiancee’s parents are in charge of the rehearsal dinner. I admit I have 10 bridesmaids, 10 groomsmen 2 flower girls and a ring bearer but do we still have to include out of town guests? The parents and the kids and the siblings of the kids, the plus one’s of the bridal party and/their children? This is getting crazy out of budget and my future in laws say no to out of town guests, no to all kids and no to the parents of said kids. What is the right way to handle this?
Post # 2
Wow well that’s part of having 23 people in your bridal party lol.
Here is who I would invite
-BMs + spouses
-GM + spouses
-Flower girl/ring bearer + parents (you cant NOT invite their parents)
-Immediate fam involved in the ceremony
No out of town guests. No “plus ones” (spouses are NOT +1s).
It doesnt have to be fancy. You can do pizza or tacos after the rehearsal.
Post # 3
I would invite your wedding party and their significant others, the kids in the wedding and their parents (and siblings, if any), and both your immediate families. If you have to downgrade to pizza or similar to keep it on budget, then do so.
Post # 4
invite those involved with the rehearsal and their spouses.
when is your wedding? let’s say saturday night. how many Out of Town guests are coming in friday? for a saturday night wedding, i wouldn’t arrive until saturday.
or in addition to the wedding party and immediate family, you could also add special guests like grandparents, a favorite cousin, or something. what number is your ILs giving you.
Post # 5
The minimum is anyone in the wedding party plus their SOs, immediate family, including any grandparents, siblings, the officiant and spouse or SO.
It is generous but not obligatory or always feasible to invite out of towners or a wider circle of relatives.
Post # 6
I agree with everyone else that out of town guests aren’t necessary but SO’s are. You should also consider chipping in since it was you and your fiance’s decision to have an over the top bridal party and not your in-law’s.
Post # 7
With a wedding party that large you could easily have 75 people before even thinking about out-of-town guests. No wonder they are concerned. If wedding party members have children what are they supposed to do with them while attending your rehearsal and dinner? Are they all local?
Members of the wedding party get SOs. Children in the wedding attend with their parents. Immediate family is generally included. Echoing PPs suggestion, you and your Fiance should offer to help with this–you decided to have an enormous wedding party and with that choice comes a lot of extra expense. A rehearsal dinner can be BBQ, pizza, Mexican–it doesn’t have to be filet mignon.
Post # 8
If it were me, I’d do bridal party + SOs, including any children and their patens, immediate family and no out of town guests. I also agree with others that it doesn’t need to be fancy and if budget is an issue that you and your Fiance should offer to pay whatever his parents are not willing to.