(Closed) Rehearsal Dinner…Who pays?

posted 8 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
Member
2000 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

My FI’s parents are paying for the dinner. We found a place that let’s us order off of the menu & so we’re guessing it’ll be about $20-$25 per person, & there’s about 20 people there. & we’re not making FI’s parents pay for the drinks, if people want to drink, they’re footing the bill for that…just because people may drink as much as they can & I don’t want people to take advantage of that!

Post # 4
Member
2532 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I guess traditionally the grooms parents pay for the Rehearsal Dinner. For us, my Future In-Laws are paying for the majority of the wedding so my dad and his wife are paying for and hosting the rehearsal dinner. They are planning to spend around $2500 and thats for food and alcohol and room rental for up to 150 people. I think ours is on the high side though – depending on what kind of food you do and how many people it can be a LOT less!

Post # 5
Member
4567 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

MR. KM’s parents are paying for the rehearsal for us. I think that’s the tradition.

Post # 6
Member
11325 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

I had never heard of the groom’s parents NOT paying for the Rehearsal Dinner…. until I got engaged and found out my Future In-Laws are not haha. So, we’ll be paying for it. We’re going to keep it to JUST: wedding party, immediate family, and those who flew to be here though, so I”m hoping to keep the total bill around 750-1000.

Post # 7
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Traditionally, yes, the groom’s parents pay for the Rehearsal Dinner. We had 33 people at ours and ours was about that price, too. My Mother-In-Law was paying and we let people know that tea and soda and water were included with their meal. If they wanted a drink (most wanted a beer or a martini of some sort), they just went up to the bar and got one. We just sorta spread the word that liquor wasn’t included. I’ve been to a few RDs where drinks weren’t included or only one drink was included, like a glass of wine. Then after that you’re on your own.

You could pick up a few pitchers of beer if it’s in your budget, too.

Post # 8
Member
937 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I think it depends on your situation. Traditionally speaking, it’s the Groom’s parents responsibility to pay for the Rehearsal Dinner, but traditionally it’s also the Bride’s parents responsibility to pay for the wedding. Nowadays, it doesn’t always happen like that.

Fiance are paying for our own wedding, and we are also paying for the Rehearsal Dinner. I didn’t feel comfortable asking his parents to pay for the Rehearsal Dinner when my parents aren’t paying for the wedding. Since we are on a limited budget, we are limiting the Rehearsal Dinner to bridal party and immediate family only. We found a restaurant close by that has a private room that can accomodate our party, and the entrees are like $20ish per person.

Post # 9
Member
289 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

My Mother-In-Law paid the caterers bill (about $1500) and we paid for all the alcohol and non-alcoholic beverages. It was not at a restaurant but at the house that we were renting for the week.

Post # 10
Member
606 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

His parents are paying but I think only X-dollars.  His dad works for Kodak and is turning 55 in June so he will be laidoff (in true, horrible Kodak form) just before our wedding.  So we are preparing to pay for some as well if it’s much over $300.

Post # 11
Member
1079 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

My Future In-Laws are paying. They’re relatively poor so Fiance said he’d pay, but Future In-Laws didn’t want him to. Our wedding is on Sunday so our rehearsal dinner is Saturday night. Restaurants here require a $1000 minimum bill (before tax and tip) to reserve a room, so that’s what we’re paying. If Future In-Laws lived here they would host it at their house and the cost would be half that since our caterer would change <$500 or Future Mother-In-Law would cook everything. We are paying for all the alcohol since that still won’t get our bill to $1000. If your friends / family are big drinkers alcohol can really add up though.

Post # 12
Member
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

traditionally fi’s parents pay, but now a days people don’t always do it like that. my sil’s family couldn’t afford to pay for the wedding or rd, so my parent’s paid. sometimes if family’s can’t pay the bride and groom will.

my fi’s parents are paying, and because we chose to have lots of people and oot guests rather than just bridal party, we’re having it at their house and bringing in trays from sams so it wont be expensive.

Post # 13
Member
806 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

My Future In-Laws are paying for the Rehearsal Dinner, they will choose the place, so whetever they decide to spend is up to them.  It will be at a restaurant. 

For the OP’s question- I would assume the cost would be very similar to paying for a regular restaurant dinner and drinks for X number of people.  $800 for 40 people’s food is only $20 a person, doesn’t sound too high if it’s good food.  Drinks for 40 people could probably add another $800 if you have some drinkers in the crowd (assuming everyone has 3 drinks on average and the drinks are 6-7 dollars per).  You could re-calculate based on what drinks cost in your area and how much you think your Rehearsal Dinner guests will drink.

Post # 14
Member
173 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

We are paying for our rehearsal dinner, it should end up costing us about 1200 for food and drink.

Post # 15
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

My FIL’s are not extremely well health-wise or financially.  We are paying for the rehearsal dinner and inviting everyone who will be in town at that point because so many of our guests are coming form afar.  However, we are doing a BBQ at the vineyard’s lake house which for ~40-50 people will be around $500.  Wegman’s is wonderful!

 

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