(Closed) Rehersal Dinner

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Should significant others of the bridal party be invited to rehersal dinner
    Yes- people will be offended if not : (28 votes)
    85 %
    No- It's your wedding, they should understand : (2 votes)
    6 %
    could go either way- you risk it : (3 votes)
    9 %
  • Post # 3
    413 posts
    Helper bee

    I think you need to invite the spouses/SO of the bridal party if they are married/engaged.  It’s the proper thing to do.  If you can’t afford to do it there, perhaps just have it at a different place where the budget will allow.

    I know you like this place but…

    Post # 4
    87 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: March 2011

    I know it sucks sometimes, but you really do have to invite SOs of the bridal party. The only exception I can see to this would be if you were having such a small wedding that they weren’t even invited the day of.

    Post # 5
    4137 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    if they’re married, engaged, or living together, you have to invite the SO. if not, you don’t have to invite them, but your bridal party probably wouldn’t appreciate it. they are spending a ton of money to be in your wedding, after all. find a new place that you can afford.

    Post # 6
    7695 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2010

    @MasqueradeMom: agreed. Even if people arent engaged/married. My bf from high school has been dating her boyfriend for 8 years….of course he was invited to our wedding. If he had to stay in the hotel room while she was at the rehearsal dinner her (and his) feelings would have been really hurt. Could you have the wedding there and still have the Rehearsal Dinner somewhere else?

    Post # 7
    661 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2011

    You’re going to get mixed views on this one.  I was in the same boat – though it was financial reasons rather than maximum space.  Financially we were trying to make it to where the SO could be invited with the bridal party, but we just couldn’t afford it.  Some will say you should invite them because even if one is in your wedding, they are a unit (so to speak).  And some will say they will understand.  So be prepared for mixed views.  🙂

    Truth is, I think most will understand considering its a space issue (more than anything).  Can you hold the rehearsal dinner somewhere else??  Is it possible?  If you CAN do that, then I suggest inviting the SO to dinner.  My Fiance and I have been in weddings where the SO’s were not invitied – we weren’t all that thrilled about it, but we also understood (it wasn’t a big deal really).  But, since we’re close with our bridal party AND their SO’s – we wanted to make sure they were all invitied.  (and I mean spouses, significant others; if they’re living together, they’re invitied.  If they are just dating and we’re unsure if “this one will stay” lol then I’m afraid not)

    My best suggestion is to talk to your bridal party about it and see how they feel if their SO’s were NOT invited (informing them of the situation).  You’ll get feedback on what to do next.  Good luck!

    Post # 8
    5786 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I know this is probably not what you want to hear but I think you should invite their SOs. Especially if they are engaged/married. These people are spending quite a bit of money to be part of your day.

    Post # 9
    642 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    What is it about the place that really attracts you?  Is it the atmosphere or decor?  Or is it the food?  I just ask because if it’s just the food, why not ask them to cater the rehearsal dinner and hold it somewhere that can accommodate your wedding party and their spouses/SOs? Personally, I agree with those here who say that the SOs should be included.  

    Post # 11
    6394 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2011

    @cmkelly831: If they’ve been together for less than a year, then I’d say you’re in the clear! That’s usually the “cut-off” point.

    Post # 12
    229 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I’m not sure if this applies to you, but if any of them are traveling I feel even more strongly that their SO’s are invited. Otherwise they’ll be left to room service while your party’s going on. Even putting etiquette aside, it would seem odd to me if the celebration of love between you and your beloved required that other people can’t be with their own.

    Post # 13
    1161 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2011

    IF they aren’t travelling you could possibly get away with it, but honestly I’d probably find another place.

    The topic ‘Rehersal Dinner’ is closed to new replies.

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