Post # 1
My husband and I visited a shelter today since we have decided to adopt a dog. We found a dog that we felt we were a good fit for, fully researched on the breed, and can financially care for the dog. Our application was accepted and we made an appointment to come and play with the dog. We loved him and I thought everything would be fun until the woman asked us if we were having kids. I said no, not right now since we are newlyweds and even though I understand why they ask, I think that the fact that we don’t have children now should be enough. She then said “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you were a young couple and you can’t take care of a dog when you have a baby. “
What????? Really? Just because we are young and could have a baby in the future, we aren’t fit for a dog?
Post # 3
that is beyond ridiculous. I’m sure the dog would be a hell of a lot happier in a home with a baby than a shelter. This doesn’t seem to be an uncommon problem, either. We were rejected because our family lived on a farm. Well fine, then quit whining how you’re too overcrowded and need money/families to adopt, if you won’t accept the ones wanting to adopt.
And who the hell is that woman to assume she knows your plans for the future?
Post # 4
Thats really strange! You would think that since you are not planning on having a kid right away they would like that since you would have time to train a dog prior to bringing children into your family! Im sorry to hear that you didnt get that wonderful dog. Is there any way you can appeal and go to someone higher up and explain the situation?
Post # 5
That is beyond ridiculous.
Is that a shelter policy or just the opinion of one woman?
Post # 6
That sucks! I’m a big fan of informing the management about their questionable institutional policiies–have you thought about calling the Managing Director/CEO of the shelter?
Post # 7
Yeah, when we adopted our cat we felt like we were going through a process to adopt a child. I understand these shelters have to maintain standards, but some of them seem to seriously interfere with dogs getting placed in very loving and capable homes. I’d try to follow up with someone else if you want this dog. My parents got a puppy when my mother was pregnant with me and that dog was spoiled rotten and never ever neglected.
Post # 8
I can’t believe they’d turn you away just from that. They should’ve asked you if you would be committed to both a baby & dog or something. I’m sorry :(. If you really like that dog, you could say “oh we talked about it & decided we don’t want kids for X # of years & when we do have a baby, we are fully committed to keeping our dog”.
Sadly, a lot of people have babies & “get rid of” their dog (or cat). I see SO many ads on craigslist & volunteered at the shelter & sadly, its kinda common :(.
Its so sad how many GOOD homes are being turned down because of minor things… the fence isn’t tall enough, you already have a pet, etc … but you might one day have a baby is something new.
Post # 9
I hate these kinds of stories. I loathe that some shelters make these kinds of policies. I used to volunteer at a no kill shelter, and I learned through the years that many of the groups who appeal to folks through cute animals are frequently not the groups that actually support helping those pets out by matching them with great homes.
It kills me because I once adopted a dog who was considered unadoptable after he – I kid you not – peed on a local news anchor during a weekend profile feature immediately after the anchor read off the fact that the pup had been previously housetrained. (We discovered later that the dog only peed on people he didn’t like!) Apparently, it even made one of the national “funniest video” shows back in the day, so no one really looked into the dog after the profile.
I’m so sorry to hear this, and I hope you guys are able to find a shelter that has another great dog looking for a good home. Not all of them are so judgemental.
Post # 10
Thats so bizarre! We just adopted a little over a year ago and they asked us about everything and we were honest about our upcoming wedding, desire to have kids and my finace having a 2 year old son and we were still allowed to adopt. And Harley was only 3 months old and a HUGE handful at the time.
Post # 11
Having been in your position and the position of the adoption coordinator I see both sides of the argument.
On one hand you have this wonderful young couple who aren’t ready to have children but would love to add a little furry addition to their home. They are financially stable and meet all the requirements. Overall they seem like great candidates.
On the other hand you have this young couple who is considering children and children pose a risk to the dog. Not just in the physical sense but in the sense that a significant amount of animals are sadly returned when couples start having children. Either the animal sheds too much or maybe they don’t want to take the time to socialize the animal with the child or maybe they just don’t want to do with caring for a pet AND a child. These seem silly but it’s extremely common and very sad/frustrating for the shelter. Animals are often seen as disposable and shetlers do their best to prevent that.
Despite all of that I HATE when good homes are turned down for minor things. I suggest you speak with someone higher up. Find out if this is the policy of the shelter or if she was simply making a judgement call(which you often have to do as an adoption coordinator)
If you really feel you are up to the long term commitment and you really know this dog is the right breed, temperament, age, etc. for your home then I would approach this with a level head and show them why you are the best home for this dog.
Good luck and I really hope you get to bring the dog back to your warm, loving home.
Post # 12
That seems so odd. I guess I can understand where @SweetHoneyBee: is coming from, but I’m sorry you’re going through that.
Post # 13
I used to work at an animal shelter so I can understand their mindset. While I agree its unfair to turn away someone who wants to adopt a dog, try and see it from their point of view:
So many young couples adopt a dog (most of the time they buy a puppy) because of the ridiculous mindset that having a puppy will be good training for when they have a baby! Well, yes puppies and dogs need a lot of care and training its not like raising a baby, its like raising a 2 year old that weighs as much as a 8 year old (depending on the breed) and some people get pregnant while their puppy is still in its puppy stage, that is to say it requires lots of care and hands on training. These people once the baby is born realise that the dog needs as much care as the baby, but since of course their child is more important to care for than the dog (they can’t take the baby back to the hospital after all) they end up not being able to care for the dog and take him/her back to the shelter.
Not everyone does this obviously, but shelters everywhere see this same story play out all the time. Young couple adopts dog, young couple gets pregnant, young couple only has time for one and of course the one they choose is the baby, so dog ends up back in the shelter. Its really sad that so many people ruin it for the good people, but that’s an unfortunate pattern of shelter life. I’m so sorry they rejected the adoption but I hope now you can see what they see on a daily basis, they can’t automatically tell you’re going to be different. Try talking to them about what I’ve said and reassure them that won’t happen ad maybe they will work with you 🙂 Good luck!
Post # 14
that sucks, i’m sorry to hear that 🙁 i agree with PP’s, you do need to speak to someone higher up, and mention the name of the person you spoke to before if possible
Post # 15
There was an article on an “ask abby” site I read about this recently. Shelters and adoption groups have sometimes gotten to the point where they have so many restrictions for adopting animals that most people can no longer adopt. If you are young, have children, have a baby, have another dog, both people work, you don’t have a car, your yard isn’t __ square feet, you would only feed it dog food, you would feed it human food, you would walk it only once a day, you would walk it too much… it gets ridiculous.
Don’t let this get you down. My ex and I adopted a dog and went through the same thing. One rescue group wouldn’t adopt to us because we weren’t married (but had been together several years). I argued that our chances of staying together are just as great as if we were married and to get divorced, but not a chance. Another group wouldn’t let us adopt because our backyard wasn’t fully fenced in so we would have to keep a dog on a lead until the ground thawed. Finally we found someone who would adopt to us.
I can say, after that experience, with certaintly, that I have had a dog in a 1 bedroom apartment, in a fenced backyard, in an open backyard, in -40C and in +45C, around children, with no children, while two people worked, while one person worked, while engaged, common law and single, and let me tell you, DON’T LET ANYONE SAY YOU DON’T DESERVE A DOG, because it is more than possible!
I would tell them that you thank them for their time, but this is why many people don’t rescue and go to backyard breeders. Maybe they will start to get a clue.
Post # 16
That is ridiculous! DH and I adopted our dog the week after we got back from our honeymoon and we fully intend to have multiple kids (but would never give up our dog because we had kids).
The shelter never even questioned it.