(Closed) Rejecting DIY gifts?

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: DIY gifts you don't want....

    Accept. Be gracious, its not nice and possible social suicide.

    Reject. Where there's a will, there's a way!

  • Post # 17
    Member
    611 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    View original reply
    @village_skeptic:  “Agreed: the favors are a sweet offer, but you’ve already made other arrangements. The painting — your guests can and will get you anything for a gift. Your responsibility is to thank them graciously.”

    Right on! Do not under any circumstances reject your friend’s painting–it would be incredibly hurtful to her.

    Post # 18
    Member
    5653 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 2012

    The painting? Sure if they want to make you a painting that’s fine. Accept it graciously.

    The cupcakes though I would just say “Thanks, but no thanks”. You already have a cake. 

    Post # 19
    Member
    2436 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    @blinx:  I’m split. I say, reject the cupcakes as that is something that you will not really be recieving, but that you will be forcing on others.

     

    Accept the painting. That’s for you. Even if you don’t like it, be nice and jsut tuck it away somewhere. No one said you have to display it.

    Post # 20
    Hostess
    1425 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Turn down both graciously.

    Cupcakes – OMG I wish you offered earlier! Unfortunately we have already ordered our cakes and favors but thank you so much for the offer. I appreciate the thought but have to decline.

    Painting: That is very sweet of you to offer. Fiance and I still have to consolidate and move our things together and pick our our theme and decor. If you insist on gifting us a painting; please select one that you think fits us best.

     

    Post # 22
    Hostess
    1425 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    View original reply
    @blinx:  Yay!!! So glad it worked out! I hope her flower arrangement skills are better than painting! If not, maybe assign her to work on the “greeting table” and leave the centerpieces and decor to the professionals? 🙂

     

    Post # 23
    Member
    4496 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    The painting, yes, you should accept that.

    The cupcakes are different because they’re something you would be giving to your guests, from you. You can tell her thanks so much, but you guys are already going to have tons of extra cake for people to take home. 

    Post # 24
    Member
    1736 posts
    Bumble bee

    Like others, my answer is two-fold. In terms of the cupcakes, you can easily decline in a very gracious manner by telling Future Sister-In-Law that you are “astounded by her generosity, but we have gone in a different direction for wedding favors” and then suggest that perhaps she might be willing to make cupcakes for your rehearsal dinner or something (or not).

    In terms of the painting, that must be graciously accepted whether or not you intend to display it in your home. I received plenty of shower gifts and wedding gifts that were one-of-kind items that I can’t go out and return and I would never tell someone that I would prefer not to accept. Just take it and recognize that it might be the only way they can afford to give you something to celebrate your nuptials. (Hey – that’s what closets and guest rooms are for…!! Storage!)

    Post # 25
    Member
    2638 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2006

    View original reply
    @AB Bride:  +1

    Post # 26
    Member
    113 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    as an artist myself I tend to give my stuff to family members. but i allways take into acount the persons tastes. like i look at the art they allready have and make something that would fit in, with my own twist of course. so I think you could say it not your style and if she really cares she wont press the matter.

    Post # 27
    Member
    950 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Reject the cupcakes, accept the painting. You already have cake arrangements so that should be easy to understand and explain.. still thank her kindly for the offer. Rejecting the painting will be seen as (and kind of is) an insult. 

    Post # 28
    Member
    261 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    For you Future Sister-In-Law, i would say no thanks then suggest another project she can work on for the wedding so that she doesn’t get offended.  Picture….. if you take it, remember that you have to hang it somewhere! lol

    Post # 29
    Member
    7635 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    View original reply
    @blinx:  I’m glad that worked out well!

    Post # 30
    Member
    192 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I think the cupcake issue has been well covered by previous bees 🙂

    Personally, I would be honest that, while you appreciate the gesture and love having an artist for a friend, that the artistic style wich works so well for her just doesn’t match your decorating style. Or, if you already have lots of artwork, you can say you’ve put yourself on an art diet since you have run out of space to display what you currently have.

    Since she’s offering instead of just presenting you with a finished gift, I think you have the option to politely steer her in another direction. Perhaps she’d be interested in creating a set of mugs, a picture frame, or a platter at a paint-your-own ceramics store. That might end up being cute since you don’t have to be a fabulous artist to make some really cool things in that medium.

    As one PP said, if you accept a painting she will expect to see it displayed when she visits, which opens up a whole new can of worms :/

    Post # 31
    Member
    407 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    Accept the painting, and then throw it away, turn down the cupcakes.

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