(Closed) Relationship Frustrations (Arrgghhh) – Advice????

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 47
Member
982 posts
Busy bee

@lovemoore:  He’s a big boy, surely he can set his own alarm and get up in time to get to work? He’s being petty by blaming you – if you had known about his meeting, you both could have come to some arrangement with the dogs, and it’s ridiculous that he expects you to be a mind reader.

Discussions about where the relationship is heading shouldn’t have to end in a screaming match. It’s not a confrontation, it’s a heart-to-heart – no need for him to yell. You deserve to know where you stand.

My SO and I will go for long periods of relationship greatness, then one of us will get stressed or snappy, and that causes the other to get frustrated, and an argument will follow – either about nothing, or everything. And it will be a couple of days of crankiness, but you get that – things can’t be fantastic and flowing all the time. Sounds like your SO felt attacked, and now he’s trying to make you feel bad by picking on everything – things that aren’t your fault. 

i don’t blame you for being upset about christmas – it’s not fair of him to say ‘I WAS going to propose, BUT….’ and then not even bother with a gift at all. If he’s having issues in the relationship, then he should TALK about it – not bring it up like that, and in a way that makes it seem like his lack of proposal is all your fault. How genuine was he – did he have a ring, or was it just a cop out?

I his temper and anger is of concern to you, that’s a huge red flag – amd if he manipulates every argument to make to look wrong, or be made to feel like you should apologise, this is a red flag too. Just some things you have to think about. It might be a communication issue, some people can really clash when they argue. Counselling for sure sounds like a good idea – it gives you both a chance to modify the way you communicate. It’s better to seek that help now, than wait till you’re married and still having the same issues.

Post # 51
Member
771 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@lovemoore:  He sounds like a tool.

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