(Closed) Relationship Issues, Am I crazy?

posted 5 years ago in Married Life
Post # 4
Member
1798 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

*Hugs* He sounds very inconsiderate. I think he really needs a wakeup call. It’s really not fair that he’s not taking your feelings into account when making decisions (his schedule, your neighborhood, the car, etc).  I don’t have much advice, but I do think his actions show that he doesn’t value you or your time together and that’s not okay.

Post # 5
Member
2450 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

he sounds like a selfish jerk. take the dang car.

heck, i think you should go and buy a car without him. you said you have the money.

Post # 6
Member
661 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@rosworms:  AMEN AMEN! 

@msfahrenheit:  AMEN AMEN! 

@bestbuddies:  Yes, I think you should go out right now and buy the car yourself. I have commented on your other post and I didn’t realize you worked full time and went to school full time. And that horrible commute on top of that? Girl, I’m amazed that you are even still alive. That schedule is enough to kill a horse. I feel for you. I wish I could bring you a chicken matzo ball soup like I have been eating (I too have been sick this past week) and a new Mercedes. 

Post # 7
Member
817 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

GO BUY A CAR….He is being controlling and inconsiderate. If you have the $ banked and it belongs to both of you, buy a car. Why should u freeze ur ass off because he’s d*cking you around about a car when he’s driving the car you share??? If he cared, he would have given u the shared car a year ago. What man lets his wife commute in freezing temps for 3 hrs a day?

Post # 8
Member
1798 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@rosworms:  +1 on this too. Also, I am in the process of buying a car now and virtually all major brands are offering big discounts through the end of 2012. It’s likely that waiting till January will only end up costing you more money. Even if you DH’s contract isn’t renewed, he will eventually get another job and you two will still need a second car.

Post # 9
Member
688 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

You’re not being crazy, it sounds to me like he’s being dismissive of your feelings and it’s like he’s trying to talk around you or something. But I like how you got your point across.

Post # 10
Member
3121 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@bestbuddies:  Hugs.  How stressful.  I think this one goes both ways.  Are you standing up for yourself?  Make sure you’re doing on the housework and cooking because you want to…not so that you can have something to hold against him.  I can be very guilty of this if I’m not careful.  Take the car for the last week.  That will ensure that he will buy a new car!  I would give him until the first, though.

Post # 11
Member
4 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I agree with everyone else.. I think you guys seriously need some one on one time to sit and communicate too. If you let this slide, and keep things from certain family members it will all build up even worse. Be honest about everything and try to talk in person, when he’s not working and his only focus is talking to you. If that means you have to wake up at 3am to talk to him, do it. good luck hun.

Post # 12
Member
4275 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Wtf…he can take the taxi and you can take the car then! I’m sorry I hate to talk badly of him, but that is not cool at all. What an asshole!!!

Post # 13
Member
317 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I can sympathize with a lot on your side. My husband works long shifts on second shift (he works from about 2pm-2am most days) and I work 8am-5pm, so we only see each other on weekends (if he doesn’t have to work!). I also have a really long commute. I know how hard it is to find time to discuss issues. But don’t argue over IM. It’s so easy to misunderstand the other person’s tone, etc. Also, you have to keep fights about the current issue. It seems like it started out about a car, but then you throw in cooking and cleaning the house and sleeping too late and whoa, this is a lot of issues to throw in an online argument! That being said, it’s tough to be without a car and I would be putting my foot down about that!

Post # 14
Member
3121 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@misslene:  Completely 100% agree with your post.  

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