(Closed) RELATIONSHIP TROUBLE – BFF

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Do I tell my BEST friend her husband is seeing another woman behind her back?

    NO - It's none of your business

    YES - She is your BEST friend

    Give her husband an ultimatum to tell her

    Tell her you will support her no matter what (while keeping the other woman secret)

  • Post # 17
    Member
    839 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    @Katie Koekblik:  All I would say is if I found out the person claiming to be my best friend knew this about my DH and didn’t tell me, I would be furious.

     

    Post # 18
    Member
    6014 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    NO way do you give him time.  He’s not showing up at work, no money coming into the house because hes spending it all on the sloppy girl that “gets” him.  If you give him time, he’ll empty out their accounts and your friend will be out of luck.

    Think about if this was you….. your BFF knows .. .KNOWS your husband is having an affair and your BFF doesn’t tell you??? 

    You have to tell her. You have no choice, they have children this isnt a joke or a boyfriend, the lives of those kids are going to get worse.  

    When my Mom passed away my behavior was similar, too much drinking, out too much too late, but I didn’t have a family.  I know this is out of character and you did offer to help him but you need to tell your BFF everything or be prepared to loose her.

    Post # 21
    Member
    839 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    View original reply
    @Katie Koekblik:  I hope they can work it out. She just deserves to know everything before making the decision to try. I think you’re doing the right thing.

    Post # 22
    Member
    6014 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    I hope he’s honest with her and they can get back on track.  She really does need to know if for nothing else all the STD tests she needs, because I’m sure in his drunken stupor he and the other chick got tests and used protection.  It isn’t going to be easy but she’s lucky she has you!

    Post # 23
    Member
    3025 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

    I think the PP’s points about money are something to consider seriously. I hadn’t thought about that, but if he’s being a real asshole, he might actually empty the bank accounts. That might make me tell my friend earlier than later.

    Post # 24
    Member
    557 posts
    Busy bee

     

    When I was in  my early 20’s a good friend of mine was in a relationship. I worked with her boyfriend, they had been together for 6+ years at the time. I had a boyfriend whose sister also worked with us and was known to sleep around. Well, my boyfriend and his sister still lived at home so I was there all the time. My friends boyfriend would go over to the house with my bf’s sister until 2 am whenever I wasn’t there. My boyfriend told me flat out that he saw what they were doing and he was most definitely cheating on my friend with his sister. I told my friend, he told her he hadn’t done it and she hasn’t spoken to me since. They are now married with 2 kids.

    I do not regret telling her. I know for a fact he was and she deserved to know, what she chose to do with it (from what I heard she cheated on him so they could be “even”) was her own business. I know that I would be more hurt finding out later that my best friend knew and didn’t tell me.

     

    Post # 25
    Member
    1483 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    @Katie Koekblik:  tell her! He told you directly. I would be incredibly hurt if I were her if you kept this from me.

    Post # 26
    Member
    294 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2019

    I wouldn’t tell her,  reason being that he is going to deny it.    Then  you are going to look like a fool for trying to inform her.   She will find out eventually and you need to be there as her world is falling apart.

    Post # 27
    Member
    729 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    @Katie Koekblik:  I would absoluey 100% disclose all to her and her family, while she’s at their home and has all the support she can get. But thats ME, based on having my best friend in my life for 33 years. There’s NO WAY I could keep this from her. 

    The topic ‘RELATIONSHIP TROUBLE – BFF’ is closed to new replies.

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