(Closed) Remembering loved ones..

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
570 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@jessy03516: 
In lieu of gifts donate to Breast Cancer Society

Instead of table numbers pictures of loved ones that passed away enclosed on back with whom they were

Unity candle in her honor to be lite during the ceremony

A table honoring those that are deceased

A rose to represent her (been to wedding that do this)

Post # 4
Member
143 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@jessy03516: First of all, I am so sorry for your losses.  Do you have any siblings, aunts and uncles, or godparents who could sit by your father during the ceremony? I’ve seen other bees on here talk about leaving flowers where a loved one would sit, if that’s a possibility for you. 

I like the idea of using her favorite flowers, and making a dontation to an organization like Komen. Were there any favorite songs or readings your Mom had that you could incorporate, if that wouldn’t be too upsetting for you? 

For the other relatives, I like the idea of a memorial table, or something in a program (if you make any) remembering  your mother and hte grandparents. 

 

ETA: Also, if you have any of your mom’s jewelry, wearing it might also be a nice way to remember her. 

Post # 5
Member
5984 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 1999

@jessy03516:  Sorry to hear about your losses.  Undecided  I, too, have family members, friends, and a Maid/Matron of Honor that have been “touched” or lost to breast cancer.  So, we decided to donate to Susan G. Komen.  We had signs created that looked like so:

We also had a memorial candle that my hubby and I lit during the ceremony.  While we were lighting the candle a special poem was read aloud. (I can’t find the photo, but it matched our unity candle). 

 

Additionally, you might want to have something special on your bouquet.  I chose to have my Grandmother’s cross attached to mine.  It was one of my favorite details! 

 

 

Post # 6
Member
715 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

We will be honoring our grandgrathers (two on his side, one on mine) on our programs by adding this at the bottom:

In loving memory of GPA1, GPA2, and GPA3

I love the idea of gerbera daisies in memory of your mom, and the touches of pink for breast cancer. FIs mom had breast cancer when he and I first started dating, and it is something close to our hearts, so having a donation to the breast cancer awareness society is an awesome idea too. 

Post # 8
Member
1611 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I am trying to think of something to do as well to honor both of my parents since they have both passed away.  I don’t want to do something to sentimental because my sister doesn’t want to break down in the middle of the ceremony.  What I have decided to do is to use my mom’s favorite flowers (peach roses) for my and my bridesmaid’s bouquet.  I was also thinking about getting an antique locket and putting a picture of my parents inside and keeping it one my somewhere.  I am having a hard time deciding because I definitely want to honor them, but don’t want to turn it into a sad occasion.

Post # 9
Member
281 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

In your programme. Can be modified to change to daughter/grand daughter etc…

All 4 of my grandparents have passed so I’m putting this in the program to honour them.

Dear Lord please clear a spot for them

they should have the perfect view.

Their granddaughter is a Bride today,

and I am counting on you.

Let me feel their presence;

as I journey down the aisle.

But let me notice their absence;

if only for a while.

Let me stop to think of them;

As I am given away.

And know that if they could;

they would be here with me today.

Dear Lord please clear a spot for them;

they should have the perfect view.

And if they should get sad today;

Dear Lord I count on you.

 Also lighting candles at the reception

Post # 10
Member
281 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Perhaps you could also have a front row seat reserved (e.g. “Mother of the Bride”) and it remains empty to honour them.

Post # 11
Member
202 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Like Onyx81 said, you can do something very very meaningful that is not public.  I agree that there’s a fine line — you don’t want to make it a memorial.

Could you wear a piece of your mother’s jewelry, drink out of her champagne glasses, or walk down the aisle to her favorite song?  Is your grandfather still around, and you can dance with him in memory of your grandmother?  

I think the donation to Komen is a given — but with some brainstorming you can do a few personal touches that will be meaningful to you, but still not take away from the joyous occasion. 

 

 

Post # 11
Member
202 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Like Onyx81 said, you can do something very very meaningful that is not public.  I agree that there’s a fine line — you don’t want to make it a memorial.

Could you wear a piece of your mother’s jewelry, drink out of her champagne glasses, or walk down the aisle to her favorite song?  Is your grandfather still around, and you can dance with him in memory of your grandmother?  

I think the donation to Komen is a given — but with some brainstorming you can do a few personal touches that will be meaningful to you, but still not take away from the joyous occasion. 

 

 

Post # 12
Member
67 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

FI’s father and my grandmother both died right before I met him and we’ve been brainstorming this too. We plan on having a little picture table somewhere in the reception hall that’s small enough that it doesn’t take away from the wedding but still honoring their memories. FI’s sister had a tiny picture of their dad in her bouquet when she got married recently and it was very sweet.  She also had a little picture frame with every family member who died’s picture and I didn’t think it made the reception look like a memorial at all. I like the donation idea because it helps people as well as remembers your loved one. The most important thing to remember is that you need to do what’s best for you; choose what makes you feel good remembering her.

Post # 13
Member
22 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2013

So sorry for you losses. My FI’s mother passed away about 6 years ago, and my both of my grandfathers have passed on. So we will be doing a memorial table with a etched “In Memory” vase with white lillies, and an white pillar candle and this poem framed with photos of the loved ones who can only be with us in spirit.

               We thought of you with love today,

                But that is nothing new.

                We thought about you yesterday

                And the days before that too.

                We think of you in silence

                And we often speak your name.

                We have our retrospections

                And your photograph in a frame.

                Your memory is our keepsake,

                With which we’ll never part.

                God has you in his arms.

                We have you in our hearts.

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