Post # 61
- Wedding: A very pretty church.
I think it really depends on your relationship.
I rejected his first two proposals.
- We had been dating about 2 weeks, he asked me as we were shopping for pasta sauce, ridiculous.
- 3 years later – He tried (somewhere nice), we had already agreed a time frame for getting engaged, he hadn’t thought remotely about what he was going to say, at all. I was sorry because we were incidentally in a ‘perfect’ location, but…it was careless and casual. I didn’t need fireworks, but maybe 10 minutes of thought.
That might sound cold to some people, but I was going to say yes in the end (as he knew, which is probably why he didn’t try hard), I just wanted to be asked…politely, and when he did that (somewhere far less idealic, but you can’t have everything) I said yes.
I’m with you. Just because you have a very ‘up front’ kind of relationship doesn’t mean some traditions aren’t important. It isn’t ‘nothing’. Being confident of a ‘yes’ isn’t an excuse to not ask nicely, it’s a big deal.
Post # 62
I think everyone is being ridiculously harsh and there is no need to be! You were just curious and I totally understand! I feel a little dare I say “Resentment” that my fiance waited to propose for so long because my mom passed away 6 months before he asked me… So I definately understand where you are coming from. There are so many times where I wish he would have just asked sooner (He had the ring before she died)… but I also know that if he had a time machine he would go back and do it before as well! I know he carries a little guilt knowing that he could have easily proposed before but him choosing to wait meant I didn’t get to celebrate with her. Heck if we both knew that my mom was going to pass on we probably would have gotten married right in her hospital room! You are definately not alone in it and don’t let others who have no idea what your situation is make you feel entitled or wrong for having these feelings. Just remember, that your mom was there with you when he proposed. I know its hard to accept that sometimes but I really feel it is true. Good Luck with all your planning 🙂 We of all people know that we need to just enjoy life and not worry about the little things!
Post # 63
My husband reproposed…
Our first proposal we had chosen the ring together, then when he proposed a week later it was kinda like ‘here’s a ring’ ‘you have to say will you marry me!’ ‘uh, will you marry me?'<br /><br />
He hated that story, and he didn’t like the ring (felt it was too small and wanted to upgrade me). So we chose a new engagement ring when we were shopping for bands and he proposed again 5 months before the wedding. He planned the best day for me ever, horse treking followed by a picnic, and got down on one knee and proposed again. I always tell both stories, and I was happy with my original ring and proposal, but I also love the thought he put into the second one 🙂
Post # 64
I’m actually in this situation.
I’m not making my fiancere-propose to me. It’s not that the first time he proposed to me was bad or anything, it was so us but we decided on a new engagement ring a while back and with it, a re-proposal. This decision on the ring was mutual, but since I suggested it, I wanted to pay it all by myself. My fiance was the one to bring up the suggestion of a re-proposal.
In the almost 4 years of us being together, we actually went through quite a few rough times in our relationship (we even “broke up” for a few days too), therefore strengthening it even more. The re-proposal will symbolize a new start to our lives in a way over the past couple years as we’ve grown together even more.
I’m not also going to go on my Facebook and make a status saying: “I’m engaged!” cos that would just be silly.
Post # 65
First of all, I am sorry for your loss.
You asked for people’s opinions but they could have disagreed with you in a polite, or at least not rude, way. Don’t listen to them, they obviously have no sensitivity or manners.
I believe you should always do what you want and what you believe is right for you. If your fiance loves you and you explain it to him the right way, he will understand you.
I see some months have passed since you posted this, I don’t if you asked him to repropose but my idea would be that instead of making him repropose, why don’t you just throw an intimate engagement party with your family since you really wanted to share your special moment with them. I know your mom is gone now but I am sure you could do something at your engagement party to honor her.
Keep your head up, you must be going through the hardest of times, but at least you have the love of your life by your side. Your mom got to know that you were going to get married to the love of your life and that is the best part.