- 8 years ago
I know where everyone’s coming from here! I’m Dutch and my fiance is Canadian. He bought we a wonderful ring, 3-stone with 0.5c total and it suits my finger really well. However, in canada my ring seen as pretty small while my family doesn’t even comment on it other than murmurs of ‘that’s so American’. This is a really annoying trend that has carried on in the engagement and the upcoming wedding as well where I’m treated as a Canadian bride by my in-laws (i.e. lots of family involvement, willing to make a wedding a big thing, parties to celebrate engagement, bridal showers etc) while my Dutch family has been tutting about the size of our wedding party (2 bridesmaids and a best man), the ostentatiousness of Canadian weddings and the excessive involvement of my mother-in-law. Basically, it’s not Dutch enough. And don’t get me started on their reaction to the possibility of a rehearsal dinner… My inlaws don’t understand how the Dutch side can be so uninvolved and feels my family is cold-hearted which is not particularly encouraging family relations (the air is getting more and more chilly between Fiance and my mom). My Dutch family demands secrecy (i.e. the dress which I’m not allowed to show to anyone other than my mother, flowers, menu etc) while my Canadian family wants to know everything. At this point, I can’t win, neither side will ever be completely happy. So I’ve been given the advice that Fiance and I just do our own thing, but that means an engagement period and wedding planning basically on my own. Which sucks too.
Ugh, wish I’d never gotten engaged. Too late to elope?
Sorry, just had to vent.