(Closed) ring bear situation

posted 9 years ago in Family
Post # 3
458 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Uh oh, that’s a sticky situation.  A 10-year-odl might actually be a little old to be a ring bearer.  You might suggest finding another job for him, like manning the gift table or being in charge of the guestbook.

Post # 4
3331 posts
Sugar bee

I’m sure you’re frustrated that your mom made the decision to change your plans without consulting you.  At least it sounds like she was trying to be helpful and take a decision off your plate to help out.  

I like the idea of giving your 10 year old cousin another wedding related task,  if you didn’t want him to be ringbearer.  Can you include both brothers as "co-ringbearers"?  If it were me, I’d trust what your aunt said about your younger cousin not wanting to be involved.  At 6/7, he’s possibly not old enough yet to decide if he wants to be involved in the wedding in an informed way.  Kids don’t always know what’s expected of them, and he might say yes to something without truly understanding what’s going to happen on the day of the wedding.  If he’s shy or uncomfortable, it might make things difficult on the wedding day.  I’ve been to more than one wedding with a shy flowergirl/ringbearer who insisted on not going down the aisle, cried, ran straight to mom, etc.  If his mom doesn’t think he’ll be able to do it, she might be right.  Although, if you decided to include both boys, it’s possible the older one could help out the younger if there was a problem.  

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