(Closed) Ring shopping frustrations

posted 7 years ago in Rings
  • poll: What shape diamond is the center stone on your engagement ring?
    Round : (40 votes)
    45 %
    Princess : (14 votes)
    16 %
    Emerald : (2 votes)
    2 %
    Pear : (2 votes)
    2 %
    Heart : (2 votes)
    2 %
    Asscher : (0 votes)
    Marquise : (3 votes)
    3 %
    Cushion : (19 votes)
    22 %
    Radiant : (3 votes)
    3 %
  • Post # 3
    592 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I tried on sooooo many rings when I was looking. I finally started to figure out the pieces I liked from each ring and other ideas I had that I hadn’t seen yet. I took all of those ideas to a jeweler and I had a custom setting made. If you are seeing things you like maybe you can start to piece them together to make a custom ring.

    As to your involving him question – I shopped on my own for awhile to gather the ideas I wanted for the setting. I then included him in the designing. He had shopped with me enough to know what I was talking about and to know what was important to him (he likes symmetry a lot therefore wanted the ring designed to have bands on either side sitting flush). I got the ring of my dreams, he knew I would be happy and he still was involved in the process.

    Post # 4
    1729 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    Wow, um… if you’re feeling this indecisive, my vote is to pick out like maybe your top 3 favorites, and then let him choose. When it’s a gift he picked out (at least partially), you’re much more likely to love it simply for that reason.

    Regarding stone/finger size, that is such a personal thing. If you really honestly don’t want to draw much attention with your ring, then yeah, I’d stay away from the 2 ct end of things. (kind of surprising that this is what your Fiance was thinking, given how much he was balking at current diamond prices, which have risen a TON this year). How much a bigger stone stands out really depends on your social circle as well, what’s considered “big” and what’s “average.”

    Still, a 4.5 ring size really isn’t that small. It’s not much smaller than a 6, which is considered “average.” My size is a 3 for example, but my fingers don’t look noticeably smaller than my friend’s who wears a size 5.

    Post # 5
    3482 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 2011

    Don’t give up! Check out a bunch of different stores to see some different selections and get a better idea of what’s really out there. When you’ve found a few you like (and I have no doubt you will), then you can bring your guy back to the store with you to take a look and see if he has an opinion on any of them.

    Post # 6
    14496 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    This is one reason why Darling Husband did not take my shopping with him (aside from the fact that the whole proposal was a surprise and I didnt see it coming).  He did not want me to be thinking and over thinking and trying to decide FOREVER which is probably exactly what would have happen.  I gave him some pointers, links like you, and then he went and picked out a setting based on what I liked, then got the best center stone the budget would allow.  It turned out perfect, and I wouldnt have anything else now, especially since he picked it out.  And knowing me, I would second guess anything I picked out myself.  I think you should narrow it down to your top 3-5 and then let him pick his favorite and surprise you. 

    Post # 7
    185 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    You like?  Don’t give up! Just try on rings every time you go shopping and you’ll find that you are always drawn to the same one over and over again…that’s what happened to me!

    Post # 8
    1177 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    You can do it! I didn’t have a particular style in mind when I went looking, so I didn’t have the same issue.. but it took me sooo long to narrow down what I wanted! I picked one and then felt panicky like maybe it wasn’t right but I LOVE it now (just can’t wait to wear it..) but just keep looking and you’ll find “the one!”

    ETA: And my center stone will be pear-shaped. I just think they’re flattering and pretty and uncommon:)

    Post # 9
    286 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    Don’t worry! Make the most out of this time and really know what you want. Don’t be afraid to shop alone if you feel it would make it easier for you. As for the size of the center, you have to find what is comfortable for you. 

    What do you think about this? This seems like a good mix for what you are looking for… pave, itty bitty non distracting halo on a emerald center:

    (Not my picture)


    Also, don’t worry about thinking you have toddler fingers. My finger is a 4.5, my sister is a 3.25 and my other engaged friend is a size 2.75!!! It won’t look ridiculous if you are comfortabl with it. So as long as you like it, it’ll look and feel good to you.

    Post # 10
    5423 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: November 2012

    I totally understand where your coming from.  I was torn between styles and stones once.  I always always always always loved emerald cut diamonds.  Yes they dont have that sparkle but there is something about them that just makes me drool.  But I eventually had my heart set on a natural yellow diamond and when you combine the two, well hello price tag, its like a certified pre owned car. 

    Hopefully where you live there are enough jewelers with enough variety.  I live near the country’s 2nd largest diamond district and just kept seeing the same styles over and over.  Oh my finger is 4.75 so little fingers all the way!  Did you try 3 stone rings? Since solitaires didnt work for you.

    Post # 11
    1568 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I have an emerald cut and I LOVE LOVE LOVE it! I feel like it will never go out of style. It’s not trendy and it makes me think of Grace Kelly & Harry Winston, very classy & timeless. I think it’s a cut that I will enjoy wearing 20 years from now. Just my opinion though. I have a much smaller version of Kim Kardashian’s ring, emerald cut with step cut trapezoid sides, very different. Imagine the ring Sandollar posted but with the side stones chunkier and not shorter horizontally. What’s also funny is when people see my ring they all say “I’ve never seen anyhting like it, it’s so different”, I even had a guy I went to high school with (who is recently engaged) take my hand and examine my ring for like 5 minutes before declaring “I didn’t know they made rings like this, so cool”! This makes me laugh because it’s one of the oldest cuts but rarely seen.

    Post # 12
    7311 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

    Backstory: I have fat fingers (8.25), so I am super particular about rings. SUPER particular. With that thought in mind, Mr. LK and I got engaged with a family heirloom ring as a placeholder so that I could go shopping for my own ring.

    My ring shopping experience: Like you, I thought I knew exactly what I wanted. After getting engaged, I marched myself right to a mall jewelry store and asked for a round, halo set stunner. I put it on my finger and said “it’s too much. too shiny.” Who the eff says that?!?!? Me, apparently. After that I started feeling like Goldilocks. Too big. Too small. Too plain. Too fussy. Whoa gaudy! OMG it’s Tacori, I love it, and it’s how much????? I felt like a total bride FAIL. I was pretty sure that someone was going to tell me I was not “bride” material and I should just give up the hunt.

    After 5 different jewelry store fails on different days, I wanted to cry over it. Mr. LK saw how down and confused I was, and suggested that we go together to a local, independent jewelry store that’s been around for decades. I agreed, and on one magical Saturday we walked in, met the most amazing consultant, and started the process of designing my perfect ring. First we looked at rings in their stock. I started focusing on elements that I liked and didn’t like about each ring that we looked at. Our consultant took notes, then brought out a ring that was very close to perfect. I knew it would be our base model when I slipped it on and cried. I finally had something on my finger that, with a few tweaks, would be perfect. We talked about the changes I wanted made, wrote everything down, and they got to working on my custom ring. it was an amazing process and I wouldn’t change a thing.

    It was so worth feeling like Goldilocks because, when you find “the one,” it is such a great feeling of relief, joy, and even elation.

    Post # 13
    3402 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    @Aug2011Bride: Wow, the ring you posted made me swoon like majorly! & I’m not even an emerald cut lover!

    Post # 14
    1271 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2013

    @Big Truck:  i’m a size 5 (and i’m 5’8 and a rather chubby 175lb too), so i feel you on the small fingers thing, altho i’m not into bling so i don’t have that trouble.  my advice there is to go ahead and get your blingy goodness, just scale back your TCW a bit if you’re afraid it will be too much on your finger.  it sounds like you have the right idea already with looking at smaller center stones.

    what i would do is try to narrow down some options for myself and THEN get mr. big truck involved.  Fiance is a total freak in that he’s completely into every aspect of this ring-shopping and wedding-planning business (he even wants to go dress-shopping with me), but Darling Husband1 was more like your mr. big truck.  he was a heck of a lot easier to keep interested if i would narrow something down to, say, three options, and then say, “which one?” as opposed to still having every possibility out there and asking the same thing.

    and i voted oval on your poll, just because that’s my favorite cut, lol.  i do love emerald cuts though…it’s an excellent cut for showcasing the clarity of a stone.  i’m currently trying to afford a setting for a really gorgeous emerald cut aquamarine to wear on my right hand (it’s my son’s birthstone).

    Post # 15
    1271 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2013

    @Aug2011Bride:  oh wow, what a gorgeous ring!  where did you find that?

    Post # 16
    8738 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2011

    I have a size 4.5 finger also.

    I love my 1.5c cushion cut ring. I never tried on a 2c stone as the 1.5c looks plenty big. I doubt a 2c would look “gaudy” though:

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