Rings on weddingbee vs rings you see in person

posted 6 months ago in Engagement
Post # 31
678 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2020

I live outside of Boston. My SO’s older sister, who lives and works in Boston, has something like a 1.5 ct diamond in a large, ornate setting, but pretty much everyone else I know appears to have 1 ct or under.

Mrs.Bill :  I know it was definitely the case with my SO that he wanted ethically-sourced and traceable materials. He found a boutique jeweler who uses recycled metals and CanadaMark diamonds. He likely could have gotten a larger stone for the same price elsewhere, but I had told him that size wasn’t a priority for me, and I respect the research he put into finding a jeweler that fit his vision and he enjoyed working with. 

Post # 32
2372 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2017 - Courthouse

I do think with Instagram, Facebook and Pinterest in the last probably 5 years or so I’ve seen much larger rings. I don’t know if it is because of social media, but I think that plays into it. 

For example, my cousin got married in 2003 and her wedding was seriously probably 100k (in the Midwest). But her ring is maybe .5 carats. All of her friends have similar size rings. In the same area in the midwest, my four good friends who are engaged and married have 1 carat, 1 carat, .5 carat and probably about 1.5 carats. I would say the average person in my home city in the midwest is about 1 carat. 

Post # 33
3093 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2021

l1989 :  I am really not “into” jewellery so honestly talking carats means nothing to me and it has never occurred to me to ask someone their specs. When someone shows me their ring the only thing I notice about it is if I think it’s pretty or not lol

The main difference I’ve noticed between the Bee and IRL is that a lot of people on this site have halos and other elaborate settings, whereas myself and basically all my friends have either solitaires or bands with several tiny diamonds. I only know one person with a halo type setting. 

Post # 34
2367 posts
Buzzing bee

I live in Chicago and see all ranges.  I tend to notice rings on the trains/buses because if I’m sitting, sometimes people’s hands are right in my face.  I’ve seen modest rings to doorknobs. 

Most of my friends are at least a carat and I think the largest is a 3ct.  

But I can’t tell you if people on the bus/train are wearing a moissy/CZ because I don’t get that great of look at them.  

Post # 35
1021 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

i live in new england and we have a great mix from what ive seen. a lot of halos and solitaires. i have the largest center stone out of my personal group (1.5 ct princess cut). i mainly see less than a ct. for sure. but i do think it depends on where you live. obviously LA and NYC will have much bigger diamonds. i also know a number of woman who dont have diamonds at all because they preferred different stones.

Post # 36
3534 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 29th, 2016

l1989 :  It’s not just you lol The Bee is not your typical sampling for most. I live in a mid-sized city and I tend to see a lot of .50-.75ct diamond rings as well. My own is .70cts but I think it faces up larger than that (it’s a marquise) and it’s the largest in my small circle of friends and co-workers. The only person I know who comes to mind with a particularly large rock is an accountant and her husband is a dentist who owns multiple practices, so it’s not surprising. 

Post # 37
592 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

I am from Europe but I live in Omaha. My friends here are mostly some kind of expat so no ring or smaller stones (less than a carat). 

But there are two things:

I for one can’t trally tell how big diamonds are on other people’s hands. Not really. Especially if m the lady with the ring doesn’t give me her hand so I can have a good look at it. If that happens I can say a lot about it but just from walking by, sitting in a café and looking at a other women’s hand… then I am at a loss. It also depends on the hand and finger size (like a 1 ct on a size tree looks way bigger than on a size 7). I know how my ring looks on my hand but I am alsways totally astonished when I see it from a different perspective – when I got engaged back in Europe I had two friends wear it for me so I can see how it looks from afar. It looks way bigger to me on another persons hand than when I look at it on my finger. Maybe that’s the reason why I think that there are many rings bigger than mine around here. I don’t know. This is also why I can’t tell you what the “standard” around here is… 

Also people an the Bee (and pricescope and the purse forum etc) are “obsessed” with their rings. I don’t mean it in the bad way. I just say people here care about their ring and are more knowledgeable then the average person. That knowledge often helps to get a bigger bang for your buck. I definitely would say that I am obsessed with my ring. I love it so much. It’s my most prized (pun intended) possession. And I am proud of my husband for picking such a wonderful gift. And I like to show it to the bees because I know it’s a shared love. I wouldn’t go around showing and obsessing over it irl because it would come across tacky. 

And I also believe that social media makes us think that we all need a 3ct plus ring. Every store that has an insta account shows so many 3 ct rings that I must wonder who their target group is… they make it seem that that’s the standard and what you should aim for… 

Post # 38
84 posts
Worker bee

I honestly don’t pay too much attention, but if I do see a 2+ carat diamond ring, I assume it’s probably a zirconia or something. lol You never really know. I worked in healthcare for years so I didn’t see as many diamond rings. I see a lot of silicone rings though. First time I saw them I thought they were ridiculous. Now I have 2 of them. lol 

Post # 39
338 posts
Helper bee

I live in Seattle and there’s lots of tech money here. A 1-2 carat diamond is standard in the area. One of the physicians I work with married a lawyer recently and her solitaire is over 3 carats and looks massive on her size 3 finger lol

In my group, the smallest is .5 and the largest is 2. That will probably increase as we upgrade in the future. 

On the bee, I see more variations in the types of stones used. I dont know anyone in real life that owns a moissanite or sapphire. A friend of mine has a salt and pepper diamond but that’s about it. I like coming on the bee to see all the morganites and sapphires!

Post # 40
6219 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 1997

I live in a rural area with a lot of poverty, and almost all of the rings around here are +/- 1/4 ct. Very small. Then again, I grew up in a town filled with “old money”, and the women there primarily wore plain bands, no stones at all. A friend of mine lives in TX in an area with lots of “new money” where most people have between 2-3 ct, although bigger is not unusual. 

So it can vary tremendously according to location. My ring is 1.71 and would have been perfectly average when I was living in Boston or Chicago, but it is giant here. I often leave it at home for serious events (job interviews, parent-teacher conferences, etc.), although I do wear it daily if there’s nothing serious going on. 

Post # 41
2418 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I live in the midwest. Large city (for the midwest). My ring gets compliments regularly and my center stone is fairly small – well under a carat, though it is in a pretty diamond rich setting. My ring is bigger than most I see here in my area.

Post # 42
188 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

I live in NYC and most rings around my circle are around 1.5 to 3ct? My I actually never seen anyone is less than 1ct around me, I personally have 2.2ct with a pave band.

Post # 43
133 posts
Blushing bee

I mostly see ~< 1ct in my mid-sized city among my professional circle (lawyers, doctors, professors, real estate agents). We’re in the Pacific Northwest. I don’t ask around, but I don’t see a lot of people obviously “upgrading”. (Like, many doctors I know were fairly poor when they got married. They’re now fairly well off, but still have modest stones.) I’m not sure how common upgrading is outside the Bee and people like it – this community tends to obsess about engagement/wedding rings as jewelry, rather than rings as symbols!

I went with moissanite, and it was easy to be too extravagent. >2ct just doesn’t look good to me, but even our 1.75ct equivalent looks a little uncomfortably large in our circle. But hey, it’s pretty, so it’s all good  🙂

Polls have indicated the engagement ring center stone average stone in the US is about 1ct, less in the UK.

Post # 44
1321 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2018

I live on Long Island (ny) and have seen everything from no ring to plain bands to door knobs (to everything in between) from all socioeconomic backgrounds. NYC is the same for the most part. I think it just really depends on every couples budget and what they *think* they need to get. I know some people with a lot of money and have plain bands and shop target and some people that are pay check to paycheck and flashing larger rings and expensive designer goods. Like others have said, the bee is a small sample size compared to real life lol 

Post # 45
1914 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I live in San Francisco and see plenty of large rings on a daily basis.

But, keep in mind, people posting their rings on WB are those who have sought out such a form to do so (not in a bad way, I’m here too haha). So they are very ring-focused, either just on design, size, all aspects, whatever. What I’m trying to say is, not a random sampling like you see out in the world.

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