(Closed) Rogue Wedding

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
2788 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

They didn’t invite your mom or your bridal party??? Did you talk with your F-ILs to see if your mother/the BM’s not being invited was an oversight?

Post # 5
5822 posts
Bee Keeper

It’s not proper to do, however it’s not your faux pas.  You aren’t hosting, so don’t worry about it.  It’s not like you can uninvite them or ask your Future In-Laws to uninvite them.  Also I think this is a rule of etiquette that a lot of people ignore because friends or whomever want to be involved in the wedding or the celebration but can’t attend the wedding (it’s in another state or something) or aren’t invited (not enough money or space).

I would just smile graciously, say big thank yous, and write a lovely thank you note as soon as you can after the shower.  It’s your job to show them you appreciated their company and presents.  Leave the rest of it to your Future Mother-In-Law.

Post # 6
2512 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

This happened to my Fiance and I.

My Future Mother-In-Law threw us a surprise e-party and invited about 100 people. We initially planned on having an 80 person wedding including both sides. So that really put us in an awkward positions.

So because of that we kind of just sucked it up and are now inviting a total of 180 people. 100 from his side and 80 from mine (my mom pulled the whole “well if he has 100 people why can’t you have 80 people).

So basically we both just sucked it up and didn’t want to cause any drama and just decided to invite everyone and cut costs on other things instead.

If you don’t want to do that, just tell your Fiance to tell your Future Mother-In-Law that you guys can’t invite everyone.

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