(Closed) RSVP??

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
657 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I’ve heard that getting RSVPs back is the absolute worst part of the planning process. I don’t know what it is that’s so hard for people to do – just write your name and put it in the mail, but people seem to forget or whatever.

I’m sure you’ll get responses back though. If you really did mail your invitations out a month ago (so beginning of January) and your wedding is truly in July (like your profile says), then maybe people are waiting until it’s a little closer? Lord knows I have no clue what I’ll be doing in July….

FWIW, I’m getting married in May of this year and I just got my invitations and guest list to the calligrapher. You might have sent them out a little too early. Give it some more time and then start following up. When do you have to give a final head count to your caterer?

Best of luck! I highly doubt you’ll have a guest-less wedding!

Post # 4
7561 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

Ya that’s annoying but fairly normal. I wouldn’t take it personally. Is it true that your wedding is in July? People may feel like it’s too far off to send in an RSVP. 

Post # 5
13010 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I agree with AlwaysSunny — you shouldn’t have mailed your invitations until late spring for a July wedding (anywhere between 6-10 weeks before the wedding is the acceptable window).  If it were me, I wouldn’t have responded yet because I wouldn’t be able to commit that far out.  People probably think they have loads of time before thye respond! 

Whate RSVP date did you put on them?  We received all but a handful of our RSVPs before the deadline, but I wouldn’t take it personal on the grounds that it’s way too early to need responses!  Perhaps they think you just sent a save the date?

Post # 6
535 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Meh, none of my immediate family or any of the wedding party sent theirs. Comparatively speaking, out of the 50 invites, I still had to call about 10, & most didn’t come in until the week before.

Post # 7
1635 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I would start calling folks after your RSVP deadline has paased.


Post # 8
10453 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

When’s your deadline? If your wedding’s really in July you did send them pretty early, and that’s coming from me who sent my invites almost 4 months in advance but I didn’t start calling for RSVPs until about 6 weeks ahead. Is there a reason you want to know so early? 

Post # 9
7218 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

Do you have a deadline on your RSVP? If not, people probably won’t send them back for awhile. If I received an invite for a July wedding in January (a month ago) and it didn’t have a deadline, I probably wouldn’t return it until may or so.

Post # 10
277 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

We put a clear deadline on our RSVP cards so people have an idea when they should have it in the mail by, we also provided a wedding email in case they never stop by the post office. We are waiting until a week after that date to start making phone calls and just asking for a verbal RSVP.

I was guilty of that once. I filled it out and everything but it ended up sitting in the pocket of my purse for a month and a half before I realized I forgot to mail it out!

Post # 11
1772 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

Has your RSVP deadline even passed? If not, you shouldn’t be asking ppl abt rsvps at all because they have done nothing wrong. They can mail them whenever they want to Before the deadline. No need to get upset if your wedding is in July and RSVPs aren’t due yet. 

Post # 12
451 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@honeybee46131:  When is your wedding, and when did you ask for responses by? If your wedding is actually July 12, you should have sent your invitations in the first week of May at the earliest. And you should have given people until about June 21 to respond. It sounds like you sent invitations way too early.

Unfortunately, I suspect that you are going to have to call many of your guests 2 weeks before the wedding because many people will forget to respond to an invitation sent six months in advance.

Post # 13
920 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I agree with others, your date is still so far out. If I got an invite for a July wedding 6 months early, I would probably hold off on sending the RSVP too

Post # 14
603 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

I set my deadline 1 week before final numbers were due to the reception aite, so about 3 weeks before the wedding. I got maybe 40% the week before the deadline and a bunch a couple days after the deadline. I called people asking for verbal RSVPs the Monday after the deadline.

Post # 15
7902 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

Wait, is your wedding really in July? Maybe people aren’t responding because invitations shouldn’t go out until mid-May. I certainly couldn’t tell you with any certainty right now if I could go to a wedding in JULY. Your RSVP deadline should be mid-late June and you shouldn’t harrass your guests about it until the deadline has passed.

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