(Closed) RSVP Annoyance (share yours too)

posted 6 years ago in April 2013
Post # 3
Member
13290 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Not responding!  I sent mine 3 weeks ago, and I’ve gotten 1/3 back.  Seriously?  How hard is it to check the box and put it in my pre-addressed, pre-stamped envelope!  They had months and months of notice with the Save the Dates!

Post # 5
Member
8444 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

I totally feel your pain.  We have people saying things like, “well I’ll probably be there” or “I should be able to make it.”  What is that?  It doesn’t tell me anything.  My deadline is today though (I made it super early so that I’d have time to hunt down all the slackers), and I’m basically sending out a mass email that says “Since we haven’t heard a definite yes, we will be marking you as not attending.  Please get back to me today if you know you are definitely coming.”

Post # 6
Member
1710 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013 - Walt Disney World

I’m waiting for my invitations to arrive so I can get them out and these are my exact fears/annoyances!  And I totally feel you on the hispanic thing!!  I have a feelng I will be making a lot of phone calls after our deadline!

Post # 7
Member
2295 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Eh, I guess we went into it expecting some No’s, so they haven’t bothered me yet. 

Ours hit about 10-14 days ago and we have gotten about 23% back. Our deadline is March 1. I know we will have to track people down, but I went into it expecting that.

My only frustration has slightly been a few people have booked hotel rooms at the hotels we blocked… But not in the block. We are providing shuttles so it is key they are in the block so we make sure we have enough space/trips for everyone. When I realized two people did this, I added some stronger language to my website about being sure to call them and note you are in the block. 

Post # 8
Member
243 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

We’re having a Destination Wedding so we sent out our invitations ahead (9months ahead) to give guests time to plan, book a flight and hotel if they want to go. Deadline is after 3months, lots of time to think. A week before our rsvp deadline i sent an email to ALL reminding them: yes or no we want to hear from you. Come 2 months before the wedding and some aunts and uncles who never said anything suddenly tells us they’ve booked their flights! Had to make adjustments as it’s a lot harder for DW! it’s frustrating, groom and i almost had a fight!

So for our wedding, i asked my girls (and they’re my bitches!) to man the registration table and to make sure those that are not on our guest list will not be accommodated.. and i mean it!!

Post # 9
Member
15 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@butterflybride6:  🙂 I am getting married in India, and I am not even making any RSVP cards since this is “not in the culture.”

I am simply calling eveyone and marking the answers in the Excel sheet: “yes” if they bought tickets, “blank” if they did not, “no” if it’s a no. Now I am hounding the blanks like crazy, and making them convert one way or another. 

Try to get the people to commit to stuff, push them hard, but don’t expect them to do stuff that is bizzare to them. It’s easier if you adjust, and not 50 guests. At least that’s what I think. 

Post # 10
Member
1278 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

I need to vent too! My RSVP date is 3/1 so I have a month. But so far I have gotten 90 yes and 12 no out of 180 invites. We are trying to get the guest list to 150. So I need 18 more NOs to do that right? I feel like since we sent STD in June that people out of town know by now if they are going to make it right? Like just say Yes or no! and then I found out last night from my grandma that my moms cousin (so my 2nd cousin) is planning to come from Santa Rosa but I did NOT invite him! He thinks cause I invited his brother and his kids that hes invited too. Well no hes not because I ak close to his brother and his brothers oids because every time I go to Cali I see them. I havent seen this cousin in like 7 years and he lives in Cali where I go almost yearly! So how do I politely tell him hes not invited? I dont. I just DWI (deal w it) and will smile if he and his gf show up. But still so weird. And my FSILs roommate just assumed shes invited too and already took the day off work  We know and like her, but she was not on the guest list either. Grrrrrrrr. 

Post # 11
Member
676 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

My issue is not getting them back. I sent them 3 weeks ago and I know it isn’t the deadline yet but you don’t have to wait til last minute. What really makes me mad is my boss telling me everyone put in their requests for the day off(and he approved them), but they still have yet to rsvp. Really?! You took the day off to go to my wedding but you can’t let me know that you’re coming yet?! Sorry vent I am honestly hoping that we get some people who say no but since it is a small wedding and 80% family and the rest very close friends I don’t see it happening. And I am super worried about FI’s family deciding to invite more extended family since they assume they would have already been invited. This has already happened and is how we are over our guest count in the first place. Ugh…vent over

Post # 12
Member
1060 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

my issue is with food selection!

I have written ” please initial next to your preffered meal” and left spaces beside chicken, beef etc.

Everyone so far has either put check marks or 2 chicken 1 beef.

I have had to call/text everyone saying ” which one of you wanted which meal?”

ughh like how hard is it to read instructions and put your initial!!??

Post # 13
Member
37 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I had so many.

1. “Well, you know we are coming.” Uhm, no actually I don’t. I never ASSume anything.

2. The onet that added 18, yes 18 people!

3. The one who said the stamp was just to pretty to use.

4. Those that said they were coming, and then didn’t, but didn’t bother to attempt to contact us and let us know. I totatlly understand things come up, and I had a handful of people have to back out because of the flu but at least they called to let us know.

5. Those that susbstituted as they wanted. Step-moms side of the Family, great grandma decided she couldn’t make it, so cousin substituted her boyfriend (who neither me or the hubs had ever met, and it’s a failry new relationship) for great grandma.

6. And those that lost theirs.

 

If I had it to do all over again, I would come up with some mass text messaging APP that texted/emailed those who had not replied starting one week out from deadline.

 

Post # 14
Member
2295 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@Ms. BamaFan:  “2. The onet that added 18, yes 18 people!”

NO THEY DID NOT!

OMG girl, that is crazy town.

Post # 15
Member
3765 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

Half my RSVP cards were in by the deadline

What was supposed to be a guaranteed “no” turned into a “yes plus 7”

Grrrr…..

Oh well, one week before my wedding and we are at 239 when we were aiming for 250. Woo!

Post # 16
Member
3765 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

@Ms. BamaFan:  I feel so much better about my “plus 7” now. Wow.

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