(Closed) RSVP HELP

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
14005 posts
Honey Beekeeper

Etiquette “says” that RSVPs go to the person(s) hosting the wedding, but obviously you can do it however you’d like. 🙂

Post # 4
9918 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

Who is going to keep track of all of it?  

Post # 6
1837 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012 - Oak Tree Manor

@Steph93675:  Has your mom offered to help with the RSVPs? Are you super busy yourself? I don’t think it’s a big deal who the RSVPs go to (I honestly never notice, I just write my DH and I’s names on the line and drop them in the mailbox when we’re invited to weddings!). BIG BIG tip if you’re about to send out your invitations – use a pencil to write a very faint number on the back of each RSVP card, and match the number to each guest/family/couple. Some people forget to write their names on their RSVP cards, and it’s a nightmare trying to figure out who mailed which card! That saved us on multiple RSVPs. Also helps when the guest has bad handwriting 🙂

Post # 7
1729 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Gemstone:  +1 that’s accurate. We are hosting, so our RSVP’s were sent to us. But if my parents were hosting, they would be sent to them.

Post # 8
816 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

We put my Mom in charge of it, but we also have an online RSVP option & I’ve ended up being the one in charge of checking of the list. She updates me if someone calls her. I have also designated check up calls to each of us depending on who they are. My Mom contacts our family, his Mom contacts hers & we each call our friends. I think you should do whatever feels easiest for you.

Post # 10
33 posts
  • Wedding: July 2011

[comment moderated for trolling]

Post # 11
8141 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

etiquete dictates that responses should go to the host.

however, you can do what you want.

on the back flap of the envelope, i am putting my mother’s address. but i would like to receive and keep track of guests so i am having the responses sent to me. plus, i live about 30 minutes from my mom and dont see her every week. so i wouldn’t want to wait to see them, ours are not standard issue.

Post # 12
11760 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

who is host on invitation? that’s who they should go to.

Post # 13
1478 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

They go to whomever the hostess, your mother, wishes to receive them. Etiquette allows her to have replies directed to her social secretary if she has one, so she may certainly have them directed to her daughter if that is what she wants.

We actually just sent out our invitations today. My parents are hosting and sent out the inviations butthe rsvps are addressed to me because it is our wedding and I am really excited to check the mail for the rsvps!!

Post # 14
11239 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

I never really understood the whole “host” thing. We are planning the wedding. We created and sent out the invitations, and we are receiving and keeping track of the RSVPs. I don’t think I could handle not knowing who’s RSVPing.

Post # 15
338 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I have the RSVPs going to my mom’s address, but our names are listed instead of hers. 


FI and My Names

123 Moms Address

City, State 34985


The reason I did this was just because I wanted everything sent to one address, and since she is also stay-at-home I thought it made more sense to have any potential gifts sent there since she’d be home to receive them whereas they’d be sitting on my doorstep all day. 

Post # 16
2029 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@Gemstone:  Really….dang.  I guess Ill change it go get mailed to my parents then.  :/  They will have to email and call me daily so I know whos coming and whos not!!

The topic ‘RSVP HELP’ is closed to new replies.

Get our weekly roundup of the best of Weddingbee.
I agree to receive emails from the site. I can withdraw my consent at any time by unsubscribing.

Find Amazing Vendors