Post # 1
So our RSVP date is today and there are still people we haven’t heard from! We’ve received “oh wow how exciting” text messages when they first got the invitations, almost 9 weeks ago; we had some family members travelling and our invitations were ready so we sent them, also thinking the sooner they went out the sooner we would get our RSVP’s.
I was just wondering if it is up to us to chase people for their RSVP; or does no effort mean a not attending?
Thanks so much
Post # 3
For my wedding many did send back RSVP but waited a week for the slackers. Then after I would call them or send a quick text asking. Most will say, oh yes, include me, I just forgot to send rsvp. You’ll have people like that.
Post # 4
Sadly, you’ll need to contact people who haven’t contacted you. Depending on when you need to give your caterer your final count, you may want to extend a few more days’ grace period to those who haven’t yet responded. After that, however, you will need to get in touch with any stragglers to find out if they plan to attend.
Post # 5
@meeegz2587: I was just wondering if it is up to us to chase people for their RSVP?
Yes, unfortunately, it does. As the hosts, you need to know how many people are coming, so your (slightly rude) guests have a good experience if they show up.
Post # 6
Agree with PPs, unfortunately you have to do some chasing. You can’t assume someone isn’t attending! I would wait at least 3-4 days before starting to call anyone, however, because some people interpret the “please respond by” date as a deadline for them to put the response card in the mail, as opposed to the date you need to receive it by!
Post # 7
Ugh, welcome to something every.single.bride goes through. I chased my own friends, had the parents and in-laws chase down any respective family or friends they wanted invited. So yes and no to your question – it is up to the bride/groom AND the parents to chase people down.
Post # 8
We have 3 days beofre we need to tell our venue numbers for food. So I was willing to wait until then if I needed to, but I just thought I would get some other opinions. I didn’t want to count them out because they haven’t RSVP’d and then they turn up anyway. I guess I was just shocked because I’ve never left it this long to send in my RSVP for an event.
Thanks ladies, I guess I’ll sit tight for a little while longer and then chase them up!
Post # 9
@meeegz2587: No reply does NOT mean they are not coming. About a week after my RSVP deadline, I called the guests I had not head from yet. I told them that I had received and RSVP postmarked for “their city” but the guest forgot to write their name on the card, and was wondering if it was them? Sometimes people would claim the invitation as their own and others would admit they hadn’t RSVP’d at all. Either way, by the end of the conversation, I had the information I needed and I could blame myself (“4 different guests did this! Clearly I should have chosen more traditional invitations”) or give the guest an “out” to claim it was their’s all along. I hope this helps!
Post # 10
@meeegz2587: I would give it a few more days then track down the non-responders. I would not assume those who didn’t RSVP aren’t attending. It would be awful to make that assumption and then not have enough seats, food, favors, etc for those people. Get a definitive answer for sure!
Post # 11
@meeegz2587: us too! I usually send the RSVP back right away so I assumed others would to….totally not the case 🙁
Post # 12
We just created an email address for our RSVP’s. We spoke to people that had the RSVP cards and the said they were useless, people would lose them, or complain that they couldn’t get to a post box; so their one suggestion to us when we started planning our wedding was to have something “simpler” for RSVP’s. I thought an email was very easy. The majority of our guests are on Facebook daily, it takes the same effort to log into their emails as it does to log into Facebook. I am happy to give people a few more days to RSVP but it just made me feel like “what’s the point of supplying a due date?” The soon to be married couple has enough to worry about without chasing people for RSVP’s, but that’s not the case it seems, lol at least I’m not the only one it has happened to!
I have to tell our venue numbers by Friday, that’s why we had our RSVP date as Monday, I knew there would be some slower than others – call me mean, I assumed it would be the older guests, but it’s all younger ones! I thought even if it is the older ones, I can call them or visit them like I do normally and just work it into conversation, but it’s people we went to school with.
Post # 13
- Wedding: October 2014 - Church
@meeegz2587: I wouldn’t assume. There are some cases where the post actually loses things (happens with invites, too), so just gently ask if they are coming or not.