(Closed) RSVP Message Wording Help??

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Which RSVP wording should we use?
    Option 1 : (9 votes)
    60 %
    Option 2 : (3 votes)
    20 %
    Option 3 : (2 votes)
    13 %
    Option 4 : (0 votes)
    Other? Please make suggestions in the comments - I need all the help I can get! : (1 votes)
    7 %
  • Post # 2
    11482 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2009

    I would recommend using inner envelopes to indicate exactly who is being invited.  For example, if you’re sending an invitation to John and Jane Smith, but you are not inviting their three teenagers, you would address the outer envelope to “Mr. and Mrs. John Smith” and the inner envelope simply to “Mr. and Mrs. Smith.” That should reinforce the message that only those two people are being invited. (Note: If the wife has a different last name, or you know that she does not prefer the formal, traditional format, then you would address the envelopes accordingly.)

    I would keep the response cards as simple as possible:




    _____ will attend


    Please indicate meal selections __________________________________________


    _____ unable to attend


    I would avoid using any form of the “we have reserved _____ seats in your honor” language, because, by telling those you’re inviting that you have already reserved that number of seats for that couple or family, you could be opening the door wide for guests to decide to bring someone ELSE if their invited partners are unable to accompany them.

    Post # 3
    533 posts
    Busy bee

    We did this for couples and single guests with plus ones. It seemed to work well.

    Please respond by _____, __ 2015


    __accepts with pleasure, and would prefer the __steak__walleye.__declines with regret.


    would prefer the__steak __walleye.

    I know this doesnt apply to you, but we also had cards for families. The top was the same and then:

    Accompanied by their children


    would prefer__steak __walleye __chicken fingers.


    would prefer__steak___walleye___chicken fingers.


    Post # 5
    789 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2015

    View original reply
    Soon2bmrs1:  What if you slightly modify Option 1? I am probably going with something similar to the below:

    The favor of a reply is requested on or before the First of August, 2015.

    We have reserved _2__ seats in your honor

    _____ Happily Accept

              Number Attending____________

    _____ Regretfully Decline

    Name(s) of attendees: ____________________



    Post # 7
    533 posts
    Busy bee

    View original reply
    Soon2bmrs1:  We let the guest fill in their own name and the name of their spouse or plus one.  (And on the family card, the guest filled in the kids’ names also.)

    We had one RSVP card for couples and another RSVP card for families.

    We think it worked well. Out of all the invites, we only had one person added on a kid line. 


    Post # 8
    1846 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2016

    I’d go with option 1.  I think the simpler, the better.  Putting all those numbers on it just seems excessive.  I don’t understand why people wouldn’t be able to indicate how many will or won’t attend.  They could just put a 1 on the “happily accept” line and 1 on the “regretfully decline” line and then write in the name of the one person who is attending.  

    The topic ‘RSVP Message Wording Help??’ is closed to new replies.

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