(Closed) RSVP rant

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 4
1578 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013 - Country Club

I agree! I had people sending me text messages to RSVP, and I’m like, “Just put the damn envelope back in the mail!” I put a stamp and I addressed it… Urgh! It’s so frustrating.

Post # 5
11233 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

I was putting invites together yesterday at FMIL’s house, and she told me not to bother stamping hers or a few family members because they’re going to be in town next weekend and they can just pick them up. I told her that regardless, the RSVP card MUST be returned to me so that a) the RSVP stamp doesn’t get wasted, b) I like getting mail, and c) I need to have a physical answer if I need it. I told Fiance that if he gets texts/Facebook/calls/emails/etc. with responses, to repeat ad nauseum that they NEED to send the card back. 

I addressed and stamped our RSVP envelopes, and there are only three things to fill out (name, number coming, and checking yes or no)!

Post # 7
1729 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@MrsBeck:  That’s my beef. Like…I’m so glad these goofs are wasting my logo zazzle stamps!

Post # 8
382 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

so with you on RSVP frustrations. especially with older relatives, this CAN’T be the first wedding you’ve been to! you get an invitation, it tells you how to RSVP, you do it.


I had the opposite situation. as random luck would have it, my parents were moving house at the same time as my fiancé and I in the months leading up to the wedding. we didnt want any RSVPs getting lost with everyone changing addresses so we had online RSVPs. we had one family who hadn’t got back to us and when my mum called to check if they were coming, her friend told her “I realise your daughter doesn’t know this, but wedding invitations should come with an RSVP card to return by mail. she didnt provide their address so I had to make my own card and send it to your address” gahhhh there was a reason we couldn’t have postal RSVPs! their card eventually got to my parents place through mail forwarding but it was pretty late. apparently my husbands grandma made a similar comment to my Mother-In-Law.


i know everyone has their own ideas about how things should be done, but whether its by post, email, website, phone, whatever… just do what the couple asked you to do in the invitation!


we also got a few gifts after spreading the word that we really didn’t need anything, I know it’s totally ungrateful to be annoyed about a gift but think about it… we live in a different country, we are going in our honeymoon… we don’t have room in our backpacks to cart a china tea set around asia! of course it’s the thought that counts, and the gifts were lovely, but if its the thought that counts… maybe think about the couple’s situation? now my mum has a bunch of wedding presents sitting in their house waiting for whenever we move back home.


if a couple seems to be doing things a bit differently, there’s usually a reason for it! 

Post # 9
280 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Oh we had this happen with so many guests…it’s beyond frustrating!!

We made cute mad lib RSVPs and really wanted people to send them back so we could enjoy reading them and to keep them as momentos. SO many people ‘lost’ it or never sent it back and we had to track them down. Then, when we track them down they just told us yes or no and didn’t bother sending it back.

One couple is coming but hasn’t sent the RSVP back after a few requests. Kinda need to know what dinner option they want….ugh!

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