(Closed) RSVP Vent!!!!! ARRRGGGHHH

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
637 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I am sorry to hear it.

My deadline is end of week next week and like yours…only 50% replied at this point.

I would start chasing them casually on Monday.  Either “REMIND” them to send the RSVP back to you, or just tell you on the phone/email right then. 

Another thing is…you can gently tell the guests the venue “need” the headcount on this deadline and if you didn’t hear from them then before the deadline, you won’t be able to accommodate them later (:P) 

Post # 4
Member
1361 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

The due date is the 28th of June?  If so, they haven’t missed the due date, so they’re not really being rude.  Once the due date has passed, you can call them and ask if they’re coming.

Post # 5
Member
1361 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@lamkky:  Personally, I think it’s rude to start bugging people before the due date that you set.  They haven’t missed any deadline yet, and they may not have forgotten and fully intend to get it back to you on time.

Post # 6
Member
3625 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

For the non-RSVPers, I would call rather than assume they aren’t coming, That would make it less awkward than assuming they’re not coming and having no escort cards and no room/food/drinks for them the day of. Since you have a month prior to your wedding, I think you should be okay.

Post # 8
Member
1361 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@furtureffcaptwife:  TOTALLY!  And I think you’re right, there will be people who don’t RSVP at all.  But I’d suggest waiting until immediately after the deadline and then start calling them 🙂

Post # 11
Member
1361 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@furtureffcaptwife:  You could ask your parents and Future In-Laws to help call people, especially if the people are “their” guests.  And definitely make your Fiance call his own friends!

Post # 12
Member
637 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@Beckster329:  That depends on the relationship of the people you are inviting, in my opinion.  I am only inviting close friends and family and it’s a casual event, so some of my friends didn’t even bother RSVP via the channel I provide them and just tell me to note down if they come or not via IM.  I never found it rude from my friends checking with me to see if I am able to come prior to deadline.  Lots of the times I actually meaning to RSVP but I forgot.  Or at that time if I have something to decide on I can honestly let them know too.  It’s all about communications.  I do plan on sending a reminder email to those who hasn’t RSVP yet to remind them the deadline is end of month next week. 

I do know a lot of people tend to forget to RSVP once they receive the invitation. 

I have to confirm with vendors a month before event and that could change if the turn out rate is 13 tables vs. 12 tables. 

 

Post # 13
Member
1361 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@lamkky:  Good point, I think it does depend on the group and the formality.  My cousin had a formal wedding and she facebook messaged me like weeks before the deadline to ask if I was coming… I only had the invitation for 4 or 5 days before she called!  Maybe she was just excited, but I couldn’t understand why she set the deadline and then ignored it herself.

Post # 14
Member
602 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

breathe 🙂

try not to stress, as has been pointed out, I know it’s frustrating but the deadline hasn’t passed yet.  Give them until the deadline day and then start politely but firmly chasing.

I hate having to chase people, as if you don’t have enough to do!  good luck!

Post # 15
Member
637 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@Beckster329:  Yeah but you had a good point.  If OP, your event is formal, maybe you ought to wait for one more week before chasing people down.

I see your point though some people just got too excited.  Following up with you after 4 days is just soo extreme!  I didn’t realize how much planning is involved in wedding until I am in one! 

 

Post # 16
Member
206 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Walnut Beach Resort

My deadline was JUNE FIRST and I AM TRACKING PEOPLE DOWN AT THIS VERY MOMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!

GRRRR.

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