(Closed) RSVP with a +1

posted 5 years ago in Reception
  • poll: Have any of your guests invited with a +1 RSVP'd for 2 but don't have a date yet?
    Yes : (5 votes)
    42 %
    No : (7 votes)
    58 %
  • Post # 3
    3569 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I haven’t send mine out yet. However if they rsvp without someone, I would call them and tell them you are giving final numbers to vendors so if they don’t have a plus one by now you can’t accomdate them.

    Unless it’s a guest from oot or doesn’t know anyone else. This is why I am not issuing random plus ones to everyone.

    Post # 4
    1278 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    I havent had that happen yet but how about how frustrating it is when people I didnt invite w a plus 1 are rsvping with a guest! I didnt give people in the wedding party who werent dating someone seriously a plus 1 because I feel like they will be busy and the guy or girl wont know anyone and will just be bored sitting there alone…..I dunno. So I have like 5 guests all “trying to find a date”. Seriously? I just dont get why if youre in the wedding party and know a ton of people at the wedding why u have to just bring a date? ugh

    Post # 6
    989 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I think I only had one guest who didn’t know who she was bringing when I printed our seating chart.  I told her that I’d just be putting her name on the chart (no “& Guest”) but that there would be 2 seats for her at the table.  If I had needed an entree choice from her, I would have asked her to just pick one.

    Post # 7
    520 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2013 - Callanwolde Fine Arts Center

    One of FI’s childhood friends doesn’t know who she’s bringing yet. She just got out of a long term relationship and won’t know a ton of people there, so I don’t mind leaving her escort card blank until she figures it out. It isn’t a huge issue for us since we don’t have a meal selection, but I could see how it could be frustrating.

    Post # 9
    11239 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    Ugh, one of my FI’s friends did this (and our invites haven’t even gone out yet). We had planned to give him a +1 because he had a girlfriend, but they broke up. We went out to dinner shortly after they broke up, and he proceeds to talk about needing to find a date to the wedding…and then asks our waitress what she’s doing on…then turns to me and asks what our wedding date is.

    Post # 10
    753 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I hadn’t even considered this happening…lol another thing to worry about lol. If it did happen I’d do what TwoCityBride suggested and call them up and say that we need final numbers. 

    I’m going to be fairly strategic in my plus ones because the wedding is so small, but I also want to give my closer friends the opportunity to make it as enjoyable/romantic for them as well. 

    Post # 11
    1278 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    @MrsWBS:  Exactly our thoughts! Its so frustrating because everyone assumes u HAVE to bring a date to a wedding. Like coming alone is an awful thing or something. Its not!

    Post # 12
    3341 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2013 - Rhode Island

    @MrsWBS:  Tell them they have to tell you now or they’re getting chicken.  You can’t keep the caterer waiting.  If they don’t end up bringing someone, oh well.  I think this kind of thing happens a lot, although I agree I’d be really annoyed too!

    Post # 14
    925 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    A few years back I RSVPd with a +1 for a friend’s wedding, as I was fully planning on going with my then boyfriend. Shortly after we broke up, I let her know it would be just me. I mean, her invitation was on my fridge, so I had the constant reminder.

    (Not like that’s any advice, but that’s my .02 🙂 

    Post # 15
    3002 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    This had not crossed my mind…..and I’m seated dinner. crap.

    Post # 16
    34 posts
    • Wedding: June 2013

    This happened to a friend of mine – in addition to people adding a +1 when their invitation didn’t say ‘& guest’.  IMO the only people that should be getting a +1 are people that won’t know anyone else there (like a co-worker), someone who will be traveling a long distance to attend, or someone who has a significant other.  I think it’s inconsiderate that someone would send back an RSVP without having a specific person in mind to provide the name/meal choice to the bride and groom.  Now that you find yourself in this position I say you just pick the meal for the mystery guest.

    I’d also be tempted to contact the RSVP’er closer to the date and let them know in order to finalize your final numbers with your vendors you need an actual name, otherwise you won’t be able to accomodate the +1. 


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