(Closed) RSVP Woes

posted 6 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
Member
466 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I dont know since I am not at that stage of the wedding. However, a friend of mine whose RSVP’s final day was May 1 sent out a reminder email about 3 weeks before. 

Just a funny tidbit…two of the people she sent an email to, emailed her back and asked “whats an rsvp?”..SMH

Post # 5
Member
46402 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

You can try sending an email asking those who have not rsvp’d to do so, but you really shouldn’t do that until after the rsvp date has passed. No faux pas has been committed until that date  has come and gone.

Like most couples you will likely have to do some follow up phone calls.

You can ask a family member or member of the wedding party to help. The groom can also pitch in.

 

Post # 6
Member
1361 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

From what I’ve seen here on the bee, this is a common problem.  I would start calling people as soon as the deadline passes… I don’t think it’s safe to assume that people who didn’t respond aren’t coming!

Post # 7
Member
214 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

UGH I feel your pain. Our deadline date is 5/12 and so far about 1/3 of the people invited have RSVP’d. We even made it easy on them-all they have to do is go to a website and click yes or no! And this includes FI’s parents, his best man, etc. I’m getting close to sending a reminder FB message to these people

Post # 8
Member
674 posts
Busy bee

From what I’ve heard, quite a few people will respond in the final week or put it in the mail on the deadline date. Basically, deadlines when it comes to mailings are really postmark dates in anything else in life. We’re always people who are RSVPing at the last minute according to those response dates because we just put it in our head that we need to make our decision by then and get it out the door by that date. We don’t add up the time it will take arrive if the hosts are expecting a mailed response.

Post # 9
Member
50 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

My RSVP date was Tuesday, and now it is Friday and I am still missing almost 20% of them!  I decided I am giving them until tomorrow, and as soon as the mail arrives those who have not sent them back are getting a phone call.  I have not decided what to do if they do not answer/call me back promptly.  The most frustarting part is nearly all of them are my fiance’s family and we are not sure if they are actually coming or not!  so so frustrating

Post # 10
Member
416 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I too am experiencing this from guest and it is mainly from people who I speak to often. And when I do sent out a gentle reminder the responses I have gotten are ” I cant find my invitation so this is my reply” or “well you know that I am coming rite”. I told my Fiance that whoever dont send in their RSVP might be SOL for a seat. Im not calling anyone, its ridiculous that we (brides) go all out (cut guest list, make invitaions, provide stamps, ect.) and people cant even be considerate enough to just ” check the card and drop in the mail”.

Post # 11
Member
79 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Ugh, this makes me nervous for when I send out my invites!  Good luck getting those late RSVPS, ladies!

Post # 13
Member
104 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I was kind of stresing because I have my RSVP date almost 2 months ahead of my wedding date, but now I’m thinking that this was a good idea! I have it all planned out when I’m going to tally the results and then I’m planning on making a list for:

– My Mom (If anyone from my family doesn’t respond)

– My Future Mother-In-Law (If anyone from the groom’s family doesn’t respond)

– The Groom (If his friends don’t respond)

– Myself (If my friends don’t respond)

And giving ourselves 2 weeks to track these people down since it’s summer time and people will ultimately be on vacation during this time period.

My hope is to have everything set 4 weeks before so I know how many tables I’m going to need. My florist needs to know final counts 4 weeks out. 🙁

I’m not looking forward to this and already envision fighting with my Future Mother-In-Law over this. She already thinks that she can invite people by word of mouth and we are having a backyard BBQ. But, no we are having a formal, ballroom wedding with a sitdown dinner with a meal choice… That her son wanted of course! 🙂

Good luck!

Post # 14
Member
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Calm down.

What you see as “OMG they only have a week to respond!!!” they see as “Its ok, I still have another week to pop that thing in the mail.”

You won’t receive all of them between now and your deadline, but you will receive most.  Don’t start calling until a week after the deadline, since a lot of people wait to mail the cards until the actual deadline (similar to taxes!)

Post # 16
Member
78 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Know what else is extra frustrating? When your RSVP deadline has passed, remider (begging for response) emails/facebook messages have gone out- and you see these people updating and posting on facebook, but not responding to your messages or emails. GGGRRRRR!!!!!!! I’m giving it until Wednesday before I begin to go nuclear lol. I’ve already prepped my dad to be ready to do his super annoying follow ups, and Fiance has no clue but he will be doing some stalking by this weekend as well. I just don’t understand why it’s so difficult for people to give a definite answer!!! I swear, my RSVP even had a funny little “RSVP by May 5th or else bring a chair and a sandwich” to be sarcastic and kind of imply RSVP or don’t bother in a way- and I’m doing my best to get people to give me an answer. BUT I’m thinking that if the final date to give the final guest count comes and goes and I still have people who haven’t resonded to my pleas for a response, I will have to email or message them and let them know that unfortunately I had to give a final count to the venue and since I didn’t receive any response from them, they should really actually plan on a chair and a sandwich if they still plan on coming at all. *sigh*

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