(Closed) RSVP’d no…now what? URGENT

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Do we go or stay home?
    Go to the wedding : (3 votes)
    6 %
    Stay home : (47 votes)
    94 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2450 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    @ithinkpink90: if it’s his friend, he would know best… but i think he should at least talk to his friend first.

    Post # 4
    Member
    595 posts
    Busy bee

    I would absolutely not just show up. I’d say if it was a really casual, backyard wedding you could ask the couple if it’d be ok to come but otherwise no way! 

    Post # 5
    Member
    1128 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    @ithinkpink90: Could you show up later in the evening, after dinner for drinks? You could just skip the dinner part. That way you can see them still, but not mess up their food/seating arrangement.

    Post # 6
    Member
    2142 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    You RSVPed no that means you don’t show up.

    They don’t need the hassle of figuring out where to fit you two on the day of their wedding. Don’t go. Send a gift if you really had wanted to go but could not because of the more important original plan.

    Post # 7
    Member
    7311 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

    If you went, there woiuld not be a table for you to sit at, food for you to eat, etc. AND you would be placing the bride and groom in an awkward situation. Absolutely do not go.

    Post # 8
    Member
    2651 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2016

    I would stay home because that is two plates that they would have paid for. If you do decide to go, go to the ceremony, get something to eat in between and then go to the reception after dinner. That way there is no awkward “oh, i have to feed you now,” moments.

    Personally, I would just stay home, though.

    Post # 9
    Member
    4887 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Nope, don’t go. And don’t call them asking either – this is a stressful day with tons going on, the last thing they should be doing is trying to figure out how to fit more people in.  This is a bummer though, I definitely feel for you!

    Post # 10
    Member
    1128 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    …on another note I may be offended if someone said they could not come, then they did it would make me feel like coming to my wedding was second choice…but it would all depend on the couple too, you know them best!

    Post # 13
    Member
    287 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Weddings are not the kind of thing you can change your mind on the day of…to even ask them if you can come when you already said you weren’t coming is kind of rude, IMO.

    It’s too bad that your plans fell through but that’s life. No one wants to deal with unexpected guests on the day of.

    Post # 14
    Member
    5110 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: November 2011

    I dont know his friends. I would be a little irritated after organizing everything and making a seating chart etc. If he wants to go then he should talk to his friends and see if it is possible, but I would NOT just show up unannounced without letting the bride and groom know. No matter how laid back they are that is rude!

    Post # 15
    Member
    611 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    you are absolutely right–and he is absolutely wrong! It’s a bummer but you should definitely not go.

    Post # 16
    Member
    7693 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    If he is close to his friend, I would go after dinner. 

    The topic ‘RSVP’d no…now what? URGENT’ is closed to new replies.

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