(Closed) RSVPs are sooooooo slow to come in :-(

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 17
Member
535 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Im inviting about 60 and so far have 11 RSVPS.  Of course I’ve had 3 invitations returned and one never received it (so far), and all of them have confirmed they were coming. Several others have verbally confirmed,  but I still want that card!

Post # 18
Member
910 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Sooo normal….. and so sad…..

I actually gave people a week after the RSVP deadline to respond (figured a bunch of people would put the card in the mail the day before the RSVP was due)….

I still had to call/email/facebook about 10 people……..

FOR FUTURE BRIDES…… I WOULD SUGGEST GIVING YOURSELF EXTRA TIME BETWEEN THE RSVP DATE AND THE DATE YOU NEED TO SOLIDIFY PLANS WITH THE VENUE IN TERMS OF FINAL GUEST COUNT……. WEDDING PLANNING IS STRESSFUL ENOUGH AND IT CAN TAKE UP TO TWO ADDITIONAL WEEKS TO TRACK DOWN RSVP’S FOR ALL GUESTS….. I GOT A LOT OF CRAP THAT MY RSVP DATE WAS 6 WEEKS PRIOR TO THE DATE OF THE WEDDING…. BUT I KNEW THAT SOME GUESTS WERE NOT GOING TO RESPOND PROMPTLY AND I WAS NOT GOING TO BE EVEN MORE STRESSED OUT STALKING PEOPLE FOR A RESPONSE…..

WEDDING PLANNING IS HARD ENOUGH WITHOUT GUEST RSVP DRAMA………..

Post # 19
Member
11736 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@MrsSweetT: Yep, most people don’t put them in the mail until the last day. Give it a week or two past the deadline to start contacting people.

Post # 20
Member
470 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Totally know what you’re going through. I would say we had to track down almost 75%, if not more … And we stamped and addressed the envelopes too!!

Post # 21
Member
7199 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

View original reply
@MrsSweetT:  I put our RSVP for my friends wedding in the mail the same day I got the invitation and she never received it! I was so annoyed. But yes, it does seem most people wait until the last possible moment. I’m not sure why. 

Post # 22
Member
3751 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I’m definitely taking @californiabride2013’s advice and setting my RSVP date early so I will have time to follow up with people that don’t respond. So frustrating. I always fill the card out asap and drop it right back in the mail. It’s just so rude for people to not respond.

Post # 23
Member
881 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

We are having this same problem now! We have 57 responses left needed two weeks out from the RSVP date but what stresses me out is its essentially all of our “we have no clue if theyll come or not” people so I am anxious to find out hahaha We need our numbers/ meal choices one month out so I set the RSVP date for a week prior thinking most people would respond. There is still two weeks left to RSVP but our guests have had the invites foreverrrr it feels like haha I clearly have patience issues! I hope you have received some more! 

 

Post # 24
Member
9163 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@MrsSweetT:  I don’t get why brides complain about this. You set a date and a guest has until that date to send it back. Save the complaining until the RSVP date has passed. Your just creating stress by worrying about it now.

 

Post # 25
Member
1603 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

What is upsetting to me (OK, not really upsetting, just disappointed), is that other than people who have to line up babysitters or need to ask the boss if they can get the weekend off,  I would like people to respons, YES, because there is no other invite they can get for that night that they would put in front of my wedding.

Post # 26
Member
2836 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@MrsSweetT:  Whoa– I’d be slightly frustrated.  We had most of our RSVP’s come in right away, with only a few closer to the RSVP date- with ONE (the one that made me a temporary bridezilla) coming in on the actual day they were all due.

 

Sorry you’re having no luck…..you have SO many that haven’t RSVPed- what about starting to contact some of them– the ones you’re closest with?

Post # 27
Member
4192 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

Did your invites go out early December? If so, really easy for things to get misplaced around the holidays- I missed paying our water bill on time, because it got shoved in a stack of papers-grrr!

A few days after the RSVP deadline, you can send an email, such as-

“Hi, just want to touch base on your RSVP for our Feb 15th wedding. We know how easy it is for deadlines to slip away, but if we don’t hear from you by DATE, we’ll have to assume that you are a no. Hope you’ll be able to share the big day with us.”

Post # 28
Hostess
8573 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

RSVPs are the one thing I seriously dread. My family are HORRIBLE about things like that.

Post # 29
Member
1772 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

View original reply
@j_jaye:  +1. I do not understand why brides get irritated that guests haven’t rsvpd early. The RSVP deadline hasn’t even passed yet. If brides want rsvps earlier, set an earlier deadline. I don’t understand frustration or posting about being upset about lack of rsvps when the deadline hasn’t even passed. 

Post # 30
Member
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2014 - Silverthorne Town Pavilion

I am having this problem right now!! My date is three weeks from today and we have gotten fewer than 50% of our RSVP’s back!  I’m furious!  How on earth do people think i will get a head count without it?  Mostly I am angry be ause I sent a self-addressed, stamped envelope! Ugh!!  Sorry I have no advice; I simply know how you feel.

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