(Closed) RSVPs– fill in name for guest???

posted 7 years ago in Paper
Post # 3
Member
269 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

The only reason I would say no is what if you are inviting a family and only some of them can make it. I would number the cards if you are worried about people not writing their names.

Out of 140 invites I only had 2 forget to write it.

Post # 4
Member
2682 posts
Sugar bee

I would let the guests fill it in themselves.  You never know if one person out of the two arent able to come and then they would have to scratch out the name or re-write it.  Id write the little numbers on the back so you can track who each card is coming from if they forget their names.  We only had one RSVP sent back without a name for over 300 people invited 🙂

I think the RSVP date depends on when in Septmeber your wedding is.  Id do it about a month or so before.  It cant hurt to have it a week or so earlier so you have time follow up with people that you havent heard from.

Post # 5
Member
4485 posts
Honey bee

It would be weird if the M___ line was already filled in when the guests receive the invites. If you are making your own invites, skip the M____ altogether and print the invited guests’ names to avoid confusion.

It is standard to send out invites at 6-8 weeks before the wedding while the rsvp due date is typically 3-4 weeks before. That allows time to track down anyone who hasn’t turned theirs in yet.

Post # 6
Member
243 posts
Helper bee

My cards just had a __________________ (no “M” in the beginning) and I filled in their names for them. I couldn’t think of any reason why it would be rude plus it will save me some stress in that I won’t get any cards with no names.  I haven’t had anyone say anything to me about the fact that I wrote their names for them – no one felt offended as far as I know. So anyway that’s my opinion – I say go for it!

Post # 7
Member
66 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2008

We preprinted the names on (a.k.a. idiot-proofed) the RSVPs; we also had a meal choice, and initialing wasn’t going to cut it. It worked out really well for us, and for others I’ve seen do this. I say go for it!

I agree with Ember78 on everything she said – skip the M___ altogether if you are preprinting names, and 8 weeks is the “standard”, but give your self time to track down stragglers when you set the RSVP date!

Post # 8
Member
7175 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I’m using the Names_______________ line, instead of the M__________________ line – hoping to make that clear.

What you might do instead of writing in the names is discreetly number each card (so you know who it belongs to, in case you get some that aren’t filled out completely)

Post # 10
Member
4001 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I’d still have the guests fill in the name themselves.  Most people do understand enough about rsvp cards to do this.  What we did was just number the back of the card, as it corresponded to the number the guest was on our guest list.  So for the couple that didn’t write their names, we knew how to figure out who they were- easy peasy.  Its so much less time consuming than writing everyone’s name! 

And I’m of the belief that if people don’t rsvp to you buy the time you set for them, then they’re not coming.  Such a tyrant :).  But seriously, my rsvp date was for June 1st, if I didn’t hear from someone, we’d call them, email them and if we didn’t hear back then they weren’t included in our final numbers.  So I think giving yourself close to 2 weeks to track down the guests before the caterer needs the numbers will be fine. 

Post # 13
Member
222 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I decided to fill in our guests names with my calligraphy pen because I wanted to make sure that there was no confusion about who was invited, and because we’re having a tiny (45 person) wedding, so it was easy and one less mistake a guest could make.  There’s only one person who’s getting a “plus one” since everyone else has a spouse, so she’s the only person with a guest whose name I’m not positive of.  If we were having a larger wedding, I would have skipped it and opted for a sneakier trick like using a blacklight marker to number the cards.  I think you should also take into consideration the style of your invitations.  Ours are very unique and a little quirky, so I decided that they weren’t too formal for me to write the names in.  On a very formal invitation, I’d skip it.

And if I were you, I’d give yourself a larger (3-4 week) window to track down RSVPs after the deadline.

Post # 14
Member
1676 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I think at the bare minimum you should allow yourself two weeks to track down missing RSVPs.  My guests for the most part were *very* good about RSVP-ing ontime, and I’m still tracking down a couple of stragglers two weeks later.  Ugh.

Post # 16
Member
222 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

@Curlysue: Yay for September 5th! We finished our invites (100% DIY) early and dropped them in the mail yesterday just to get them the heck out of the house!  I’m SOOO nervous about reactions!  They’re fun, quirky, but still kinda sorta formal in the hopes that we’ll get people to arrive in the right level of formality!  It’s a bit difficult sometimes, isn’t it?  We’re having an unusual wedding — a formal cocktail party, essentially, and are trying to create a “jazz lounge” feeling, so everything from our website to our invitations is reflecting that.  I’m crossing my fingers for no one to show up in jeans, but I’m sure I’ll be too joyful to even notice if they do.  (Right?! Wink)

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