(Closed) RSVPs getting lost in the mail?

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
2640 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2014 - Italian Villa

I’ve wondered about this. How many would you say are lost? If it’s a whole bunch, that is very odd (unless they were hand-sort for some reason: square, bulky, etc). I know two of my bridesmaids didn’t get the save the dates I sent (hand-sort), but I didn’t want to follow up with everyone, so it does make me nervous that the postal service isn’t really doing their job. 

I think the bigger question, is where the heck did they all end up? On the floor of the mail room?


A number of people didn’t RSVP for ours, but there’s no telling if it’s because they were lost in the mail or didn’t bother (we didn’t follow up, because it’s a Destination Wedding, so they would tell us if they were coming).

Post # 3
46877 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

BakerBee16:  Some people lie because they are embarassed about not having responded.

Post # 4
13373 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

We had a bunch that were lost.  One was a coworker who was genuinely upset when I made a joke like, “Hey, if you’re not coming, you can just tell me!” and they had sent it back weeks ago.  Some very reliable family member’s didn’t make it, either.  Father-In-Law works for USPS and said the smaller envelopes tend to get lost in the machines, so that’s probably why.

Just start calling and getting the meal choices marked down, that’s all that really matters!

Post # 5
1348 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

This didn’t happen with RSVP’s… but I did have a couple of actual wedding invitations get lost in the mail. They just POOFED and were never seen again. USPS can REALLY drop the ball sometime. Especially when you’re spending .50+ per invite! 

If it’s a whole bunch of them, I think it might be worth looking into. But it is also possible that people lied about having sent them back. 

RSVP’s are so damn tricky. 

Post # 7
4415 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

julies1949:  agree — many people forget about these things, and then when you call to ask, they suddenly remember and mail it in that very day. So hopefully you get a whole bunch arriving within the next couple of days from people who “mailed it weeks ago” 🙂

Post # 8
129 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I agree, people are embarrassed by their poor manners and fib that they sent the RSVP. 

Post # 10
69 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2014 - MD Resort

Probably 5 of our invitations got lost in the mail, but they hand to be hand sorted and scanned. So mistakes do happen with the usps I believe everyone ended up getting theirs it just took awhile.  We had to do some calling a couple of nights ago for the non responders and they ended up declining.

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