(Closed) Rude or Cute?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Would you put one of these at your wedding?
    Yes it cute and good idea : (7 votes)
    4 %
    No its rude to ask guest : (134 votes)
    84 %
    Maybe... : (18 votes)
    11 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    5065 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2014

    I really love the idea. Maybe a post box style one though so you can’t see the money. 

    Post # 4
    Member
    4371 posts
    Honey bee

    Personally, I find that distasteful. That looks like a tip jar. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    1245 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I think it’s rude, simply because it makes you look a little “gift grabby”. Most people will already have a gift for you at the wedding & seeing the honeymoon fund jar would appear rude & as if you are asking for more gifts. Just my opinion.

    Post # 7
    Member
    9659 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2019

    I think the idea behind it is ok, but not in a glass jar like that, maybe in a wishing well type form or as a PP suggested, a postbox

    Post # 8
    Member
    111 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I personally would not find it rude.  To me weddings are first and foremost a celebration of two people, and for many that includes guests providing a little something to help the couple in their new life.  So I would find it appropriate, but you might want to consider your guests, as well, and how well you think they would take it.  I would find it tasteful and non-offensive if you place it where people can easily notice it, but don’t draw excessive attention to it (i.e., don’t ask for donations).

    Well, people who attend a cash bar/few free tickets plus cash would probably be more than happy to drop the remaining into a jar at the end of the night.  If you are doing that, of course.

    However, I want to point out that a cash jar is very easy to take.  I would only do this with a small guest list of those you know very well or place it in the bartender’s (if you have one) watch.  I read a post yesterday where many years ago a small wedding was crashed by an uninvited guy (they only knew because they caught him in candid pictures!) and many things went missing that night, including expensive bracelets.

    Post # 10
    Member
    9659 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2019

    my cousin had a wishing well for their honeymoon fund at the wedding, and i am pretty sure several people gave to it, but they would have already had money on them as it was a cash bar

    Post # 11
    Member
    701 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    I’m personally not a fan of honeymoon jars or money trees. I wouldn’t be offended, but I wouldn’t contribute to it.

    Post # 12
    Member
    1402 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    I’m not a fan of them.

    Post # 13
    Member
    4803 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    @JEHS:   To me weddings are first and foremost a celebration of two people, and for many that includes guests providing a little something to help the couple in their new life. To me weddings are first and foremost a celebration of two people, and for many that includes guests providing a little something to help the couple in their new life.

    Yes, but the guest has already provided something to help the couple in their new life. They’ve given a gift (and for most guests at a wedding, it is a gift of money), some have also attended the shower and given a gift there, some also gave a gift when you got engaged, and your wedding party also paid for their attire and the bachelor/bachelorette parties/shower. And your out of town guests also paid to get there, and to stay in a hotel room. It has to end somewhere! Putting out a jar for people to put money in after everything else just seems like extremely bad taste, like a shakedown for every last cent you can squeeze out of people.

    Post # 14
    Member
    963 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    I think it’s exceptionally rude. By the time guests are at your reception, they’ve most likely already given their gift, so this comes off as a gift grabby attempt to get then to give more on top of it.

    Post # 15
    Member
    4803 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    Gah, weddingbee kept eating my post and then put it up twice.

    Post # 16
    Member
    1128 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    I don’t know, its hard to say…we did a dollar dance and got money from that so I guess that could be considered “grabby” but if people don’t want to contribute then they won’t.

    The topic ‘Rude or Cute?’ is closed to new replies.

    Find Amazing Vendors