(Closed) Rude or Not Rude?

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
3788 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

1. What do you think?  Am I overreacting in thinking this is rude?

I do think you are overreacting. You make it sound like it was a huge burden to put stamps on the RSVPs and that you would only do so because of etiquette, and while I completely sympathize with the expense, you shouldn’t take it out on guests who chose to use an option you gave them. Also, extensive research on response rates has proven over and over that people respond if you make it convenient for them. Before the ease of an online RSVP became acceptable, putting a stamp on the envelope was the surest way to ensure that you got it back. Also, I am not even sure how people can reuse the stamps anyway. If your address is already on the RSVPs, they can’t really send those envelopes to anywhere else. I guess if they were desperate you could pry the stamp off and reglue it, but that seems like the most complicated effort anyway. Occam’s razor.

  2.  a) What are your thoughts and opinions about my fiancé’s suggestion? 

Are you really going to keep 300 RSVPs as keepsakes? How sentimental is the information on them? If someone wrote a cute note or something, I would keep it, but I imagine most are just going to be filled in. Not worthwhile enough to ask people to go out of their way to do it.

     b) Would asking our guests who have already RSVPed online, to do so again via snail mail, be in turn, rude itself?

Not really rude per se, but as a guest it would seem pointless to me and I would probably not bother. You have the information you need. Be happy they replied and you don’t have to start calling everyone up to chase down their answers!

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