Rude sonographers?! 20 week Anatomy Scan

posted 3 weeks ago in Pregnancy
Post # 2
Member
3014 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Teevee1212 :  I never had that as I was team yellow with both my babies.

 

i can understand why they might not be that pleased to be asked though. They do a serious medical role and the 20 week scan is about checking for anatomical issues, being able to tell the sex is an extra. It’s not their job to facilitate a party for you. 

Post # 3
Member
1318 posts
Bumble bee

Not sure what other’s experiences are, but I don’t think it’s appropriate to ask a sonographer to do that for you. I think the only acceptable thing to ask them to do is write it down for you to put in an envelope. It’s quite clearly stated that telling the sex of the baby, while often a perk, is not the aim of the anatomy scan. 

Post # 4
Member
368 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2019

Have them write it down. 

Post # 5
Member
342 posts
Helper bee

I agree with the other bees. Asking them to write down the gender and put it in an envelope is more appropriate than to ask them to prepare some kind of party favour. The technician is a professional who earned a degree in their skill. They are there to detect fetal abnormalities not help plan your gender reveal party. I can see how this would be annoying.

Post # 6
Member
143 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: Las Vegas, Nevada

No, asking them do to that would be rude, it wouldn’t be rude if they didn’t want to do that. Where I live they won’t even talk to you about your results or gender, they have a sign that says techs aren’t legally allowed to discuss your results and the doctors will. Just let them do their job and ask a friend to help you with your gender reveal ideas…not their problem. 

Post # 7
Hostess
8962 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: Dorset, UK

I agree with the above, the 20-week scan isn’t about the gender, it is about checking the health and growth of your baby. In the UK, where the NHS is so overstretched, they don’t have time to be faffing with stuff like that. At our 20w scan, we ran out of time and were told what they thought we were having but couldn’t confirm it as didn’t have time and that is 100% fair enough as there were other patients to see. 

 

These people didn’t go to medical school to help people plan their gender reveals! 

Post # 8
Hostess
2076 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

I agree with PPs- medical professionals aren’t there to help you with a damn party. 

Post # 9
Member
1259 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I guess I’m in the minority, but we had our anatomy scan a few days before Christmas when I was pregnant with my son. The tech had printed out a between the legs shot picture with the sex labeled on it. We asked her to put it in a tiny baby stocking we had bought. She got all excited and went on about how cute the idea was (that we were opening it Christmas Day). She told us she’d be right back and then came back with the stocking scotched taped with a little ribbon on it. We didn’t ask her to do all that extra, just to drop the pic in the stocking. So idk. I think as long as it is a very easy and quick task, it’d be ok? 

Post # 10
Member
9646 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’m sure it varies, but I wouldn’t expect more than the sex to be written on a piece of paper in an envelope.

They’re ultrasound technicians, not party planners.

Post # 11
Member
1062 posts
Bumble bee

You have them write the sex and put it in an envelope. Then have someone else conceal your actual object (a neighbor, friend, sibling, literally anyone else you trust not to spill the beans in advance). I wouldn’t ask a medical professionals to do stuff for the actual gender reveal party. They shouldn’t have been rude about it if it was a simple request, but it’s still not ultimately their job. They probably get many similar requests and I can imagine it getting annoying after awhile if it’s not that person’s thing. Some people are happy to go out of their way and fulfill small requests, others like to stick to their literal job description 🤷🏻‍♀️ 

Post # 12
Member
1899 posts
Buzzing bee

I honestly don’t see why it would be rude to ask for something simple like that. Yes, they’re there to check the heatlh and growth of your baby, but they get a ton of pregnant people every day who are excited to find out if it’s a boy or a girl and I’m sure they’re used to that. I think most health care professionals go into the profession to help people and like to see their patients happy. I don’t think it would be out of the norm for them to get asked something like this. No, don’t ask them to bake you a cake, but I don’t think putting a ribbon into an envelope would take much more time out of their day than writing down the sex on a piece of paper.

Post # 13
Member
6730 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

Teevee1212 :  geez, I can’t believe anyone would be such a stick in the mud that they wouldn’t do something so simple. Everyone saying write it down and seal in an envelope… how is that easier or faster than dumping something already provided into a bag? We waited to find out but my last sonographer was such a fount of information I didn’t ask for but appreciated, I guarantee she’d have done this with no fuss. 

Post # 14
Member
8520 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Teevee1212 :  I think that’s a weird ask. Probably no need to be rude, but doing cutesy things for a party isn’t their job. We just found out our baby’s sex this week and asked her to put the crotch-shot in an envelope so we could open it at home that night since she had already printed a whole bunch of photos for us. I felt bad even asking that but had no experience since we didn’t find out the sex with our first child! 

Post # 15
Member
882 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2019 - City, State

Teevee1212 :  Putting a pink item or a blue item inside a bag doesn’t sound like a big deal to me.  It would have taken a few seconds, so I can’t see the problem.  Maybe even easier than writing it down on a paper and putting it in an envelope.  But to each her own I guess.

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