- 3 years ago
My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 and a half years and we’ve been doing ‘medium’ distance relationship for 2 years now. I moved to another state for work and we see each other over the weekend twice a month. Things have been good between us. We’ve spoke about getting married and our future, basically the whole works. We’re both on the same page.
Basically a month ago when I was back home for the weekend, I accidentally saw a receipt of the ring he purchased. I was over the moon but I didn’t tell him obviously. I told my girlfriends who told me not to ruin the surprise. I was so ANXIOUS playing it in my head over and over again.
Everytime the topic of our future came up, he would try to throw me off and tell me that he’s going to propose next year, and it’s not the time etc.
My family is terrible at keeping things subtle.
So yesterday, my brother and mum call me asking about my boyfriend and my plans for the future. They were sort of interrogating me which made me feel really uneasy as everyone knows my boyfriend and I are pretty serious.
I sort of lashed out at my boyfriend saying you should have spoke to them about whatever your plans may be. You always say you’re waiting for the right time but it’s never the right time etc. Also forgot to mention, I’m a little stress ball.
At that time, I didn’t realize what was going on.
My boyfriend is an incredibly patient man. He tried to calm me down as best he can. We both went to sleep and when we woke up he asked if I was feeling better. At this point I was but I think I was trying to milk it as much as I could which I shouldn’t have.
He calls me and says I don’t want to do it this way, but I’ve already spoken to your parents. I went to see them yesterday. Everyone gave me their blessings. I’ve got it all planned out, I have your ring and if only you could have waited a week but I’m telling you because I don’t like seeing you upset. So I hope this puts your mind at ease.
I wanted to die at that moment!!
I was so insanely happy but at the same time I couldn’t believe I just ruined everything for him. If I could have just been patient for another week. He is an amazing man and despite all my flaws I think he’s really accepting and patient of who I am. I kept asking if he was disappointed that it turned out this way. He obviously said no, I’m dealing with you so I don’t expect anything less.
He called in the evening and called me wifey as a joke and I was like omg no. You haven’t asked yet *trying to keep with the surprise* and he just laughed.
I feel so so guilty finding out this way. Felt like such a Kate Hudson moment from Bride Wars.
I still have a week before I see him and he actually asks me.
Does this make me a terrible person?
Anyone have any advice on how I can in return make it special for him? and not just something we’re doing now for formality sake.
I really want this day to be as special as it can be for him as much as it is for me. Feel awful knowing that he’s been planning this for months and he didn’t get to see the look on my face when he actually did it.