(Closed) Rushing? What do you think?

posted 8 years ago in 20 Something
Post # 3
Member
7295 posts
Busy Beekeeper

i wouldn’t judge or really think anything given that story. the only thing that makes me think you are rushing is the fact that YOU are quesitoning it by posting this thread and therefore being unsure yourself!  

Post # 6
Member
3758 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@pmladyluck88: I say do what you feel is right πŸ™‚ I say throw “accetable” out the window… Trust me, I know!

Post # 7
Member
96 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I think you should do what you feel in your heart.  I met my guy in July 2008, started dating in January 2009, engaged by July 2009.  I have a son from a previous marriage and he has no kids.  We’ve been fine eversince.   People thought we rushed, we heard the rumors and the taunts, but if your love is strong enough you’ll prevail. Don’t do what makes other people happy do what makes you happy.  I did and I still agree with my choice.

Post # 7
Member
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I think it’s smart to wait. I would never ever criticize someone who chose not to, it is their business and not mine, but it’s really hard to tell if a relationship if going to last when you’re still in that brand-new puppy love stage. If you wouldn’t be getting married until summer of 2012 anyways, I sure don’t see the harm in waiting a bit longer to get engaged. Especially if you have had broken engagements before, I would slow down and give yourself some time.

Post # 8
Member
318 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

I think if you’re ready, you shouldn’t care what others think. And I think the fact that you’ve been engaged before makes you more mature and sure of what you want. Of course, people will talk, think that you’re young, not ready, ect. Honestly, I think there’s not right time on a calendar, it’s just what feels right for the couple.

Post # 9
Member
838 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

My Fiance and I have exactly the same story as yours,apart from it was me who moved away. We sorta dated for a few months,I moved away and then moved back.We bumped into each other and a few weeks later we were officially together.3 months in he proposed and we will have officially been “together” for about 18 months by the time we get married. As you say,we already knew a lot about each other before he proposed,and we feel totally comfortable with getting married. However I know that a lot of people were very unsure about it at first,my mother for example was very wary of if it would last etc. But no both our families are happy

My advice?do what makes you guys happy,not what everybody else thinks you should do.

xx

Post # 10
Member
7770 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

If you think you are rushing, then you probably are.  No rush, no rush πŸ˜‰

Post # 11
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

We got married at 18 months. However, we are older and neither one of us ever thought we were rushing it.

Post # 12
Member
576 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Honestly, it does sound like rushing (IMO).

being friends and dating are different. So I think 3 months of dating isn’t long enough to know if you can spend a lifetime with a person. Obviously, I don’t know you personally and it might be right for you. But be prepared for apprehensive & concerned family/friends. You need to be very certain that its the right timeline for you because you’ll probably have to “defend your position” to concerned friends/family.

 

Post # 13
Member
511 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I say this to everyone who asks a question like this: if you have to ask, then please do yourself a favor and give it somemore time. You probably are not ready.

Post # 14
Member
173 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

I understanding the questioning. From my perspective, I’d only be questioning whether it was too soon because I’d feel like everyone would judge me!

Do what you feel in your heart. I just read this awesome article earlier this week about short engagements (it also highlights couples who get engaged shortly after they start dating). 

http://www.usatoday.com/life/lifestyle/2011-03-22-shortengagements_ST_N.htm

When you know, you know. πŸ™‚

Post # 15
Member
3049 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 1991

I don’t think there is a “normal” time. My parents met and got married within 7 months (4 dating, 3 engaged). They’ve been married for over 35 years now! The only question I have is the fact that you have kids and he does not (if I gathered my information correctly). I think 1.5 years is a great time to make sure he is in for the long haul with not only you but your kids… who will be his kids as well πŸ™‚ It’s very exciting I believe! I just like to take things slower when kids are involved. I think your timeline is great… and even if you do it sooner or later, I’m sure it will be fine because YOU know yourself and your relationship, not me. πŸ™‚

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