(Closed) sad dad wont give a speech

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 17
1845 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I feel your pain, my dad isn’t giving a speech.. I asked him if he wanted to and he just flat out said no. Thankfully my mom and step dad will say a lovely speech instead.

Post # 18
7638 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

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@jen 42713:  I’ve been to a few weddings where someone else in the bride’s family gave a speech. At least one time the mother, another time it was an uncle or someone like that. If what you really want is someone to speak and welcome your FH into the family, it could be someone else like that.

Post # 19
64 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

View original reply
@Nona99:  The letter is a great idea!!

Post # 20
4044 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Maybe your dad can just meet you and FH for lunch and tell him that he welcomes FH to the family. Or perhaps your mom or another family member on your side can say it?

I also hate public speaking, and find it terrifying, and nerve wracking, and can easily  lose sleep over it. This is NOT how you need your dad to feel on your big day, you need him to be relaxed, calm, happy…and as comfortable as possible so he has a good day too.

Post # 21
1744 posts
Bumble bee

Maybe he thinks it could be too emotional for him?  Maybe he doesn’t want to share ‘private’ thoughts with the public?  PP’s suggetion of a letter to you is a good one.  You could tell him that knowing his thoughts on you wedding day would mean a lot to you and that if he wishes them to be private- you’ll respect that.  If he would allow someone else to read them, that works too.   

Post # 22
679 posts
Busy bee

Maybe your dad is planning to say something to you in private before you all walk down the aisle or something? I’ve only been to one wedding where the FOB gave a speech. Honestly, nobody remembers the speeches unless they were really bad or awkward.

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