(Closed) Sad Situation…

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 92
Member
6377 posts
Bee Keeper

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amiona:  I’m sad that it took you so long to do something.  I don’t think yelling at you and shaming you will do anything, and I’m glad your cousin will be leaving his abusive mother soon, but I’m sad that you allowed it to happen.  Slapping an 18 month old?  PPD or not, he’s a kid.  He has no one to speak for him (normally it would be the mother), but in this case he has no one.  You should have said something sooner.  I hope he’s taken out as soon as possible for his sake.  And just because your CBC doesn’t mean you can take this on temporarily.  My friend is CBC and was willing to take on a friend’s child for similiar reasons as you’ve stated here.  The child ended up being placed with someone else, but my friend started the process a lot sooner instead of feeling it wasn’t her place.  In this case it was your place.  You heard her slap her child for crying?  I just can’t get over that.

Post # 93
Member
1982 posts
Buzzing bee

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amiona:  blessings aren’t always something we want. Ever heard of the phrase blessing in disguise. I do think you should talk to your husband about at least taking him until your cousin sorts out an adoption plan.

Post # 97
Member
1378 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2015 - Chapel on Base

 

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amiona:  I want to tell you how proud of you I am.  Proud of you for the call but mostly for the temporary  arrangement.   I had happy tears rolling down my cheek when I read that you would be taking him.  The social worker was correct about you.  You have always had my respect on your posts  here on the Bee.  You have now reached another level in my opinion.  Takes a lot of strength to do what you did.  Best of luck to you three and mom too.  Keep us posted on the little guy.  🙂

For the record, I firmly believe you already knew you were making  the call and taking temporary  custody before you even posted.  

Post # 98
Member
698 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

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PinkQueen:  I completely agree with what you said.  It’s a super hard situation and until you’re in it … I just think that people juge based on what they think they’ll do until they’re in that situation.  I’m proud of you for handling it like you did, too, @amiona!  In the end, getting help is what matters, especially when this is something that will help the child in the long run.

Post # 99
Member
1771 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

I come from a similar type of culture where people don’t just call the police on their families, where abuse is sometimes condoned, and I understand the courage it took you to call CAS. I am happy and relieved the little guy will live with you for a while, until better arrangements are found.

please keep him safe.

Post # 100
Member
1982 posts
Buzzing bee

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amiona:  I’m glad to hear that you got the baby out of that situation.

Post # 101
Member
5778 posts
Bee Keeper

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amiona:  It’s so great that you’re taking your baby cousin for 6 weeks. I know that’s probably going to wreak havoc on your schedule even if you love the little dude, but you will forever know that you did this for him. I’m thinking you will be in talks etc with CAS during this time? With the goal being some professional help for the mother and the possibility of either adoption, a longer term foster care placement &/ or the mom being helped enough to care for herself & her son.

On a very personal note, my own mom had PPD and some other emotional problems on top when I was a baby and ended up under fulltime psychiatric care. I don’t know that she hit me or anything, I was too young to remember but her PPD was severe enough for her to be hospitalized so home must have been chaotic. My parents were married but my dad was pretty immature back in the day and couldn’t handle work & a baby on his own and so an aunt took me in for a few months. It couldn’t have been easier on her because she had 2 small kids of her own to care for, but I will always remember that she did that for me, even if I was too young to remember it.

Post # 103
Member
3339 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013 - Rhode Island

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amiona:  So because I am appalled that you’re posting online instead of immediately reporting child abuse, I’m “illiterate,” a “fool,” “ignorant,” and a “jackass”? And you think I’M being the rude one??! Hypocritical much? No where in my post did I curse or call you names. Just because you can hide behind the anonymity of the Internet doesn’t mean you have the right to be such a jerk. I feel so bad for that poor child who is probably being beaten right now because you’re not a good enough person to stand up and do what is right.

“The world is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don’t do anything about it.” – Albert Einstein

“The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.” – Edmund Burke

Post # 104
Member
2570 posts
Sugar bee

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Christy42213:  

THis BEE closed her account yesterday so this thread should probably be closed now

Post # 105
Member
471 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2015 - Drury Lane Oakbrook

 

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amiona:  First of all, you are not nosy.  That baby boy does not have a voice, so the fact that you are willing to speak for him is very important. 

I know you mention you and your husband have agreed to not have children.  Have you discussed the situation with your husband?  I know there are a lot of legal and emotional consequences but if other families are not an option it may be worth a discussion. 

I would just hate to see this little boy grow up either being abused for the rest of his life or being bounced between foster homes.  In any case, he shouldn’t be with his mother.

The topic ‘Sad Situation…’ is closed to new replies.

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