Post # 1
OK it’s sad that I’m asking this because no-one would blink twice if they saw a man wearing a wedding ring on his finger during an interview.
But I might be interviewing for a new job and I am a little concerned that people will look at my ring (either wedding or e-ring) and judge me. They might think “Urgh this one is going to be popping out sprogs soon” or something similar.
I’d like some insight from other bees.
Post # 3
I think employers are biased enough against women that they’ll think that about any woman who is in her late twenties/early thirties, regardless of whether she has a ring. It is illegal for them to discriminate based on your gender, but it is difficult to prove if it happens.
Post # 4
@Ms_Midori: Do you remember the movie “Picture Perfect”? It was the opposite there! They saw marriage as stability! I don’t think I could pretend to not be engaged…too proud of it!
Post # 5
Yes, I hate this as well. It’s frustrating.
Post # 6
I would wear it no matter what but if it’s a man doing the interviewing if you have no rings I’m sure in the back of his mind no ring = available .. as discusting as that is so it dunno no matter that you can’t win…. And if it’s a woman I feel like its less of an issue they know how it is
Post # 7
Yes, I did. I even explained to the interviewers that the reason I was applying for the position (in another state) is that I was getting married and my Darling Husband lived in the region, and I would be relocating to join him. (Some people in the company already knew this anyway, since I had received a great recommendation from my then-boss to a high-ranking official at the prospective new company.)
Post # 8
I took my engagement ring off for my last interview. If you do research, marriage is seen as desired in a man and can be detrimental for a woman in an interview situation. Marriage makes men seem more stable/dependable and some people may think women are just going to take maternity leave/quit once they have babies.
It’s sad, but I didn’t want to chance it.
Post # 9
I go into every interview looking the way I would look on my first day of work. Which means I would wear my ring.
You can’t hide it forever; and a person/company that would choose not to hire you because you’re engaged or married is probably not someone you want to work for. Plus, if they’re really that way they could look for reasons to get rid of you once they find out.
Post # 10
I don’t know…really, it hard for me to explain how I feel about it. I’m proud that I am engaged but I also don’t think my private life shouldn’t have an impact on my working life. I’m asking because one of my current bosses (a women no less) made the comment that she would never hire someone in my condition now because we’re more likely to get pregnant and want a reduced working day – also here women get around 3 months (I think…need to check) PAID maternity leave.
EDIT: ADDED POLL
Post # 11
I work in HR, and the thought of someone hiding their ring is so silly to me! Sure, I guess there are unsavory employers out there who might not hire a candidate because of their marital status….but would you really want to be working for that company? I know I wouldn’t!
Post # 12
@Ms_Midori: It would be interesting to find out if they hired you and THEN learned you were engaged if they would comment. That would point out that they care! I’d honestly never thought about it.
Post # 13
I have just gone through the interview process for academic jobs and I wore my rings.
My logic was that I was interviewing for a career at this institution not a job and I don’t want to work for anyone who is going to discriminate against women because of marriage.
In my second interview, I actually told them my husband was joining me after the interview so that we could explore the new city. If I got this job we would be moving to the US from Canada so it was essential my husband see it. They loved that he was coming and actually took us both out for meals once he got there. I am not going to lie their reception to my husband and their family oriented focus was a big appeal to me. I got the job and will be moving there in Jan 2013. 🙂
I know academia is often different but you honestly have to work out what would be best for you!
Post # 14
I often interview folks so I’m on the other side of the table and I’ve never put marriage or engagement in the context of “this makes someone a better candidate” or “this makes someone a worse candidate.”
Because this specific job involves about 25% travel I do make sure the candidate knows the travel requirements but I trust them to have discussed that with their family, spouse, kids, elderly parent, dog, whoever before accepting the job. We have married folks on our team whose spouses are perfectly fine with the travel requirement (and enjoy the free vacation once hubby or wifey racks up some airline miles), and single folks who whinge about having to go on the road because they’ve got a darts tournament. So I’ve been around long enough to know that marriage or the potential to have kids doesn’t really determine how good an employee you’ll be, and I’d say that reflects the corporate culture where I work (global IT company with about 14k employees worldwide, about 40% of which travel).
If someone wants to rule you out for a job based on the ring on your finger, then you probably don’t want to work there anyway.
Post # 15
@StL.Ashley: I agree. I’m in HR (normally) too and I can’t imagine taking my rings off for that reason.
I had a friend ask me if I had thought about taking my rings off (I had been unemployed and looking for a long time and they wanted to help me “get ahead”), but to be honest, if I even got the hint that I would be working for an HR department that pulled that kind of crap, I wouldn’t want to work there…even though I desperately wanted a job.
I wear my rings pretty much all the time. If someone is going to judge me because of that, too bad for them. They are going to miss out on a fantastic employee…namely, me. 😀
Post # 16
I honestly don’t know what I would do, but everyone has raised good points. On the one hand, as sad as it is, I wouldn’t want to take the chance of compromising my employment opportunities, because sexism is still actually rife in a lot of workplaces. Then again, do I want to work for a discriminative employer?
Here is another thread from a few months ago on the same topic: http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/would-you-wear-your-engagementwedding-ring-to-an-interview